A&M Aggie Sue Wins The Third Segment!

Jimmie Johnson

Jimmie Johnson has a new nickname:” Mr Seven-Time”.

The 41-year-old driver captured his seventh Sprint Cup championship — and his first in three years — by winning the Ford EcoBoost 400 on Sunday at Homestead-Miami Speedway.

Johnson joins Richard Petty and Dale Earnhardt as a seven-time premier series champion, the most by any driver. It is Johnson’s first title since 2013, and his first with this current Chase for the NASCAR Sprint Cup format that began in 2014.

Johnson also becomes the youngest seven-time winner; Petty was 42 when he amassed his seventh title in 1979 while Earnhardt was 43 in 1994 when he completed the feat.

The title comes after one of Johnson’s most difficult seasons, when he endured the longest winless stretch (25 starts) of his career. However, he picked up wins at Charlotte and Martinsville during the Chase, in addition to Sunday’s win at Homestead-Miami.

 

Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This is the first time in a long time that the winning driver did not score the most points!  Kyle Larson, because of his race dominance of leading the most points –132 laps– scored the most points. Snoopy Dawn as well as Lonna The Quilt Angel were rolling the bones with “Young Money” this week and were rewarded very well with a cool 41 points!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Both Jim, aka Chiefy and Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude were riding shotgun with newest 7-Time Sprint cup Champion, Jimmie Johnson.  The race winner delivered 40 points for these two players.

There was a trio of players, Kathy The Church Forecloser, Dan The Numbers Cruncher and Skid-Marc who were putting all their collective marbles into “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick’s sack for Homestead.  That intuitive guess paid off with a vey nice 39 points!

Bernie The Bay Area Bandit and Part-Time Stalker thought that ol “Rowdy”, Kyle Busch, could go back-to-back and repeat as Sprint Cup Champ.  It wasn’t to be his day, but she did gather up 35 points to end the season.

Rounding out the top five scorers was Linda The Cookie Mom who grabbed 32 points from Denny Hamlin’s finish at Homestead.

For the last race of the segment there was, once again, wide spread movement on the leaderboard.  Seventeen of the twenty two players changed places when the checkered flag flew at Homestead.

The single biggest movers this week is an unlikely trio of players.  That group includes Skid-Marc, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff. Skid-Marc faired the best of the trio moving up four spots ending up in 7th place.  Conversely, both Leon The Retired Airline Pilot, Parti-Time Cardiologist and Strawberry Picker and Doug The Gandy Candy Dude slithered down the totem pole four places to rest in 10th and 13th, respectively.

Karen The Highly Opinionated Southen Belle dropped like a hot potato this week, falling three places to finish in 19th place.

There were two players who moved two positions this week.  Lonna The Quilt Angel climbed up two places to finish out the segment in 15th place, while Jerry The Buschwacker plummeted two spots to land in 16th place.

The remaining players either moved up one spot or dropped one spot to cap off this segment.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

It was a very close race between four players to see who would secure “The Crappiest PIck of The Week” award.  Jeremy The Coach, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff all logged a single digit score.  However, Doug The Gandy Cand Man could only gather up a microscopic score of 5 points, and therefore wins “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award for the last week of the season.

Even though Jeremy The Coach did not score the least amount of points this week, his 6 points cemented his place in “The Outhouse”!  So he will be staring at “The Outhouse Award” for the off season, as well as the first segment of 2017!

 

Closing Thoughts

 

We have witnessed a slice of history with Jinnie Johnson’s seventh Sprint Cup Championship!  If nobody believes that this was a fete fitting of Superman, then sit back an look at the stats. Jimmie Johnson is the youngest of the three who have won seven championshps, just 41 years old!  King Richard was 43 years old and Dale, Sr. was 42 years old when they won theirs. Who knows, there could be at least one more championship within JJ’s gas tank!  Then we all could truly call him “Superman” for sure!

I wish you all a great Holiday Season, a Happy Thanksgiving, a Merry Christmas, and very Happy and Prosperous New Year!

It is just 99 days til they fire the engines up for the Daytona 500!  For the first time in about 10 years, I will be sitting at home for the 2017 Daytona 500, strapped into my comfy suffed chair and watching on my TV!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

It’s The Last Dance Of 2016!

brad keselowski

The 21016 NASCAR season is rapidly coming to a close this weekend with the Ford EcoBoost 400 at Hoemstead.  This season has rocketed by like a young USAF 2Lt. student pilot going supersonic (710 Knots) inverted down in the Grand Canyon in 1974!  Let me tell you, I know something about that feeling!  Now that the statute of imitations has expired I can plead 100% guilty of that offense!  I think that there may have been some animals deafened by my youth, bullett-proof feeling, and exuberance! But I digressed!

I would like to take this time to thank you all for your participation.  I have had a lot of fun being “your most humble sheriff” and I also hope that you have enjoyed the web site this year.

 

Our Homestead Picks

 

For the last race of the year we have  a three way tie in the vote for the favorite driver this week!

The first driver, alphabetidally speaking, would be the relief driver for Dale Earnhardt, Jr., Alex Bowman.  If he continues where he left off at Phoenix, “Bowman The Showman” could be in for his first Sprint Cup victory!   Last week at Phoenix Bowman led 194 of the 312 laps, a quite impressive day!  Carole, aka Rudy, A&M Aggie Sue, as well as Zee,aka Sissy are all in for the substitute driver!

Meanwhile, Kathy The Church Forecloser, Dan The Numbers Cruncher and Skid-Marc are really hoping that, even though “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick has been eliminated from the Chase, he can close the deal and drive his hot rod into Victory Lane!

Lastly, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, Jeremy The Coach, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff are riding shotgun on the Miller Lite beerwagon with “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski.

There are five drivers, this week, that have a cherring section of two players each!

For Tony Stewart’s very last race in the Sprint Cup series there are two players, Carlton The Doorman and Jerry The Buschwacker, who think that he has just one more victory tucked into his sleeve!

Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Bobby Blue Crush have a very different feeling.  Both players are high on Kurt Busch for the season finale.

Could ‘Young Money”, Kyle Larson grab his second Sprint Cup victory?  Both Snoopy Dawn and Lonna The Quilt Angel think that he has a big possibilty!

However, Cole The On Demand Baseball Player and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey think differently.  Both of these players are onboard the William Clyde Elliott, Jr., aka Chase, victory train this week.

Lastly, Jim, aka Chiefy and Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude  are hoping the “Mr. Six-Pack”, Jimmie Johnson can pull off a victory and thus, rack up his seventh (7) Sprint Cup championship.  If he is able to pull off that accomplishment, JJ would join the two immortals of this sport, King Richard Petty and The Intimidator, Dale Earnhardt, Sr.

That leaves just three players who are in bidnez for themselves this week!

Good luck to all! The season inds with a little “Miami Vice”!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

A&M Aggie Sue Retains The Lead With One Race To Go

Joey Logano

Joey Logano earned a return trip to the Championship 4 at Homestead-Miami Speedway after a year’s absence.

Kyle Busch will head to the South Florida track to try to defend his 2015 NASCAR Sprint Cup Series title.

And Kevin Harvick won’t be competing for the title for the first time since NASCAR debuted its elimination Chase format in 2014. Needing a victory to advance, as it turned out, Harvick finished fourth in Sunday’s Can-Am 500 at Phoenix International Raceway.

In a race that featured spectacular side-by-side racing and a substitute driver who dominated the first 250 laps of the event after starting from the pole, Logano beat Busch to the finish line by .587 seconds in the second of two overtimes.

Logano’s first victory at the one-mile track couldn’t have been timelier. The win – his third of the season and the 17th of his career – gave Logano an automatic berth in the Championship 4 race, set for next Sunday.

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

After spending all weekend at Phoenix International Raceway I did not see any familiar faces riding shotgun in the Pennzoil No. 22 Ford Fusion that race winner Joey Logano was driving. Therefore this award goes vacant this week!

 

The Shakers and Movers

 

This week we had two players really swinging for the fence, Bobby Blue Crush and Zee, aka Sissy.  Each player participated in “the ride along” program with “The Shrub”Kyle Busch, at Phoenix.  For that wild ride they each secured 39 points, and was the highest scorers of the week.

Right behind those two players on the scoring pylon was Linda The Cookie Mom.  The Cookie Mom was supporting “Young Money”, Kyle Larson, and that leap of faith was worth 38 crucial points at Phoenix,

Next we have a small gaggle of players that tied for the third highest scoring honors of the week.  That small gaggle includes Jim, aka Chiefy, his better half Edie The Last Vegas Super Star, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff.  All three players were riding shotgun with “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick and logged an all important 37 points.

Next was a quartet of unlikely players, Snoopy Dawn, her “mouth-piece” Carlton The Doorman, A&M Aggie Sue and Skid-Marc banding together and scoring 36 points.  Those points were the results of putting all their marbles into the marble sack of Kurt Busch, formally know as “The Outlaw”.

Bringing up the rear, or as I normally put it, rounding out the top five scorers this week, are Kathy The Church Forecloser and Lonna The Quilt Angel.  Both of these ladies logged 35 points, however the results come from two different drivers!  The Church Forecloser was hanging with the replacement driver for Dale Earnhardt, Jr., Alex Bowman.  Bowman dominated the race and could have very easily won the race, but it was not to be!  Meanwhile, The Quilt Angel had her money on Denny Hamlin at PIR.

As the segment nearly runs it’s couse, there was wide spread movement, but in small increments this week.  Six of the players remained in their previous spots, while sixteen players either slide up a little or fell down a little on the leaderboard.

Our biggest mover was Doug The Gandy Candy Man plummeting five (5) places and landing in 9th place.

Following the Candy Man on the movement board was David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, who like his fellow dirt track racer did not have a very good day at Phoenix.  The Throttle Jockey had a partial “crater”, sliding dfown the totem pole four (4) spots and slid into 18th placed this week.

Conversely, both Zee,aka Sissy and Jerry The Buswchwacker had a moderately good Sunday, stepping up three positions now residing in 13th and 14th, respectively.

The next quartet had a mixed Phoenix race.  Both Bobby Blue Crush and Linda The Cookie Mom stepped it up!  Yes they stepped it two places to sit it 4th and 10, respectively.

The remaining seven players either slid up one spot or slid down one spot after Phoenix.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

Our honoree for “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award belongs to Doug The Gandy Candy Man, who showed his pick prowess by selecting a normally outrstanding pick, except the this week, Jimmie Johnson.  This week ol Mr. Six-Pack only yielded 4 points for the Candy Man!

 

Spoiler Alert!!!!

We have a new “Prince of The Poohouse“, “Warrior of The Water Closet”“Guardian of The Gashouse“, and/or Ogre of The Outhouse!  It took a very huge effort to evict Kathy The Forecloser, but Jeremy The Coach has kicked her out of “The Outhouse“!  The Coach got a huge run on her, or did he just get a huge case of “the runs”?  I am not sure which it is!  But he has not only evicted her, but did it withy great flair!  He has 24 point cushion with just one race left in the year!

Next week the season ends with Championshop Weekend at Homestead!

Good luck to everyone!

For those of us who are the fringe of the money paying positions in the fantasy league, we are just hoping to have a great race so that we are “staying alive” at the end of this segment! “Well you can tell by the way I use my walk………..”

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Phoenix: Can Kurt Busch Punch His Ticket To Homestead?

Kurt Busch

 

We how have just one more race the Can-Am 500k at Phoenix, till the Championship Four grid is filled.  After looking over the choices of The Redneck Fantasy League it is quite interesting to see our choices for Phoenix, to say the least!  Also after reviewing our standings, and evaluating what the results of this race may have on the current leaderboard, it is very obviousl that, when the checkered flag flies Sunday evening, the totem pole will be shaken from stem to stern!

For those who have not scoured the standings in a while I will tell you that there are three different positions that have ties.  In fact there is one area where there are three players, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, Karen The Extremely Opinionated Southern Belle, as well as Zee, aka Sissy that all tied and are all vying for13th place.  Both Jeremy The Coach and Carole, aka Rudy are contesting 20th place and are just seven (7) points from establishing their residency in “The Outhouse” for the entire off season!

Up in the top of the leaderboard, Snoopy Dawn and Doug The Candy Man are struggling to be among the top five money paying positions for the segment.  They are tied for the third spot in the standings prior the green flag at Phoenix.

 

Our Phoenix Picks

 

Unless you all are as blind as a bat you have figured out that Kurt Busch, formally known as “The Outlaw“, has the most support from The Redneck Fantasy League for Phoenix. (That nickname was in effect during his Patrica Driscoll girlfriend days! Obviously these days he may want to known as not the rebel that he was, but just othe opposite.  Maybe we can give him a new nickname……“The In-Law” !!!!!)  Those players who are on the KuBu bandwagon this week include Snoopy Dawn, Carlton The Doorman, A&M Aggie Sue, as well as Skid-Marc.

Following the contingency of Kurt Busch fans, we have two drivers that have three rooters and we also have two drivers with a pair of players on their side as well.

Even though Chase Elliott has been eliminated from The Chase, he has acquired Kathy The Church Forecloser, Dan the Numbers Cruncher and Jerry The Buschwacker this week as support for his possible first NASCAR victory.

Meanwhile, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Jim, aka Chiefy and Leon The Retired Airline Captain, Part-Time Cardiologist, Elephant Driver and Strawberry Picker, and Your Most Humble Sheriff are all putting their marbles in the bag of “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick!

Both Doug The Gandy Candy Man and Jeremy The Coach have concluded that Jimmie Johnson is on such a role that they have “double downed’ for Mr. Six-Pack this week.

Lastly Cole The On Demand Baseball Player and Bernie The Bay area Bandit and Part-Time Stalker have bet the farm on Smoke.  Absent the fact that he won the road course at Sonoma back in June, Tony Stewart has been extremely quiet and basically not very competitive for this entire season!  Could he get hooked up on an oxygen tank, bounce back to life and be upfront at Phoenix?

Again doing the math for the next to last time for the season there are eight (8) players who to celelbrate the 2016 election day have registered as independent thinkers/players!  Yes sports fans,that means that they are in bidnez for themselves!

At this point inthe season not only are the eight drivers hoping that they are included in the “final four” to race for the championship at Homestead, many of our fantasy league players are “living on a prayer” and are thinking about their chances to win some big money!

Goodf luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP,FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

A&M Aggie Sue Sneaks Back Into The Lead

Carl Edwards pit stop

 

Carl Edwards secured a waterlogged victory Sunday night at Texas Motor Speedway, taking control late in a rain-shortened AAA Texas 500 to clinch a title shot in the Nov. 20 season finale.

Edwards’ Joe Gibbs Racing No. 19 Toyota permanently took the lead in the 258th of 293 laps, after his pit crew busted off a sub 12 second pit stop. A late evening rain shower shortened the race from the original 334-lap distance. He led 36 laps in his third NASCAR Sprint Cup Series victory of the season, the 28th of his career and his fourth on the 1.5-mile Fort Worth track.

Edwards’ victory locked up an automatic berth in the Chase for the NASCAR Sprint Cup playoffs’ Championship 4 finale Nov. 20 at Homestead-Miami Speedway. Jimmie Johnson — the Martinsville winner last weekend — is the only other driver among the eight remaining Chase hopefuls who has clinched a title shot.

Once again we have a new person atop of the leaderboard, A&M Aggie Sue inched her way from second place to week number 10 leader!

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This weekly award is given to two of our players, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as our new late segment leader, A&M Aggies Sue.  Both players were riding high with “Cousin Carl” Edwards this week when the rain came, the race was halted, Edwards was awarded the victory at Texas, and they received 44 points!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

There were two drivers Sunday that had a cheering section of two players each, betting the farm that their pick would win the race.

Both Jerry The Buschwacker and Jeremy The Coach had a really great Texas race, scoring 37 points.  Both players were were riding shotgun with “The Shrub”, Kyle Busch, on Sunday.evening.

Similarly, Kevin Harvick had a duo, Carlton The Doorman and Lonna The Quilt Angel, on his side.  This unlikely pair racked up 35 points at Texas when the rain came and the race was stopped.

Additionally, there were five players who locked down the fourth highest score for the race, with two different drivers giving them their great results.  For Kathy The Church Forecloser, Zee, aka Sissy, Skid-Marc, as well as Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude, their 33 points came via Denny Hamlin’s 11th place finish.  However, Bobby Blue Crush had his chips all in for Kasey Kahne, and he delivered a good day for him.

Rounding out the top five scorers this week is Linda The Cookie Mom.  The Cookie Mom grabbed 31 much needed points from her pick, Ryan Newman.

There are three different places on the leaderboard where there are ties between players.  That fact, if you look thoughout the standings, indicates there are pockets of competition.  And with just two races left, it supports the idea that there are still positions up for grabs!

There was not much movement this week, other than to tighten up the standings in certain groups, as the season winds down.  The single largest mover was Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude moving up just two (2) places this week!

There were were ten players who either moved up or down just one place!  Additionally, there were ten players who remained in the previous spots.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week Carole, aka Rudy, was unanimously awarded “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” with her whopping 10 points!  Now stop me if you have heard this lately, Kathy The Church Forecloser is standing guard in “The Outhouse” once again this week!  However, her overwhelming dominance of “The Outhouse”, this segment, has been something that we have not seen in the recent past.  But I will note that her closest competitor, Jeremy The Coach is just seven (7) points from evicting her out of “The Crapper”!  Could there be a party in Peachtree when she escapes for “The Outhouse”?

With just two races left in this segment and the season, Phoenix and Homestead should be very intriguing, to say the least!

Next week Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff will be hanging out in the media center, the garage area, and all around the race track, so there should be some interesting observations that will surface after Phoenix!

One thing that is a relative sure thing, there will be an extremely low possiblity of rain delays at PIR!  All though there was a rain delay last year, I can reasonalby assure you that was an anomaly!

Good luck to all at Phoenix!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Can Jimmie Johnson Go Back-To-Back?

Jimmie Johnson

With just three races left in the 2016 season, and the haulers head for the Texas Motor Speedway, the third segment tightens among the top scoring players for the final Redneck Fantasy League paycheck. Additionally, the winner take all Championship paycheck is still up for grabs, with any of the top five scoring players still in the hunt!

 

Our Texas Picks

 

This week we have five players, Snoopy Dawn, Dan The Numbers Cruncher, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff who are pushing it all in for “Mr. Six-Pack”, Jimmie Johnson, this week at the high banks of the Texas Motor Speedway.

Almost not out done this week is Denny Hamlin, who has four players in his corner for Texas.  Those four players in Hamlin’s corner this weekend include Kathy The Church Forecloser, Zee, aka Sissy, Skid-Marc, and lastly Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude.

There are three drivers that have a cheering section of two players each.  The first driver, alphabetically, is “The Shrub”, aka Kyle Busch.  The Shrub’s rooting section consists, oddly enough, of Jerry The Buschwacker and Jeremy The Coach.

Both A&M Aggie Sue and Doug The Gandy Candy Man will be teaming up together to support “Cousin” Carl Edwards in his attempt to punch his ticket to the championship race at Homestead.

Lastly, Carlton The Doorman and Lonna The Quilt Angel are partners in rooting for the “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick as his back is up against the wall to try to advance to “The Round of Four” at Homestead.

After doing basic math, once again, that leaves seven players who are truly independent thinkers and most definitely are in bidnez for themselves at Texas!

I am quite sure that all players are really hoping that their selected driver will be heading “straight on” to the checkered flag and will drive “straight on” to Victory Lane for a big celebration Sunday!

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Carlton The Doorman Sneeks Into The Lead After Martinsville

Jimmie Johnson

Jimmie Johnson earned win No. 79 Sunday at Martinsville Speedway, a race track that holds so much triumph, as well as an emormous tragedy for HMS, after topping the board for 92 circuits of the Goody’s Fast Relief 500. Similiar to the Round of 12, “Mr.Six-Pack” won the opening event in the three-race Round of 8.

Johnson is the only Chase for the NASCAR Sprint Cup contender with a guaranteed spot in the Championship 4, where he will vie for his seventh championship to tie Richard Petty and Dale Earnhardt, Sr. This marked the Hendrick Motorsports wheelman’s ninth trip to Victory Lane at the short track, equaling him with former teammate Jeff Gordon.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This award goes vacant this week, since not a single player was on the Jimmie Johnson bandwagon at Martinsville.

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

This week we have five players who share the highest scoring title.  Those five players include our new points leader Carlton The Doorman, Carole, aka Rudy, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as Linda The Cookie Mom, all adding 39 points to their totals.  Even though they all racked up the same tally, they all did not support the same driver this week!  In fact there were three different drivers who all scored 39 points this week, Denny Hamlin, “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski, and Matt Kenseth.

Lonna The Quilt Angel, Skid-Marc and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey were rooting for “Rowdy”, aka Kyle Busch, and able to add 37 points to their scores!

The quintet of Snoopy Dawn, Karen The Extremely Opinionated Southern Belle, A&M Aggie Sue, Dan The Numbers Cruncher, as well as Cole The On Demand Baseball Player alll were able to put 35 points into their totals.  Both Snoopy Dawn and The Severely Opinionated One were hanging out with Dale Jr’s replacement driver, Jeff Gordon.  Whereas Aggie Sue, The Numbers Dude and The On Demand Baseball Player were betting the farm on Martin Truex, Jr. today.

Over the course of this segment there has not been a whole lot of great news generated by the newbie, Kathy The Church Forecloser!  However, this week she was able to put a very nifty 33 points into her column and close down the huge deficit between her celler dewlling performance and her closest competitor for that ever coveted “Outhouse Award”!  This week she was able to narrtow down that deficit to just three (3) points between her and Jeremy The Coach, with just three races left!

Rounding out the top five scores in week nine includes the duo of Jim, aka Chiefy and the youngest of the Hammack sibblings, Leon Your Most Humnble Sheriff.  Both players were rooting for “Young Money”, Kyle Larson, and were rewarded 28 points for his finish at Martisville.

This week only six players remained in their previously assigned positions, meaning that 16 players changed places this week.  The single biggest mover this week was Zee, aka Sissy who plumetted five spots, falling to 16th place this week!

Four players moved three (3) places this week.  Doug The Candy Candy Man, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, as well as Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle all climbed up the ladder three spots resting in 4th, 13th and 14th, respectively.  Meanwhile, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit, and last week’s leader, slithered down the totem pole three (3) places to land in 4th spot this week.

Five players moved two (2) places this week.  Carlton The Doorman, Linda The Cookie Mom and Carole, aka Rudy all stepped up two (2) spots on the leaderboard to sit now in 1st, 11th, and 19th, respectively.  While both Jerry The Buschwacker and Jeremny The Coach stumbled two (2) places to sit in 17th and 21, respectively!

Four players moved next door one spot.  Snoopy Dawn stepped up one place, while Bobby Blue Crush, Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff and Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude all lost one spot on the totem pole this week!

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week’s winner of “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” goes to Jeremy The Coach who showed his prowess of adding just 5 microscopic points to his segment tally!  And stop me if you have heard this sentence before, Kathy The Church Forecloser sits all alone on throne of “The Outhouse” again this week!  The good news is that she narrowed the point differential from 20 points to herclosest rival down to just three (3) points.  It appears that Jeremy The Coach is making a very late segment charge to the bottom of the totem pole trying to evict our third segment cellar deweller!

After 500 miles of beating, banging, and bruised egos at Martinsville, next week NASCAR unloads just north of Fort Worth,Texas, at the Texas Motor Speedway, just a mile or two northwest of Alliance airport!

Just remember one thing, cold Fort Worth beer just ain’t no good for jealous!

“Does Forth Worth ever cross you mind?”

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Truex and KyBu Are Co-Favored For Martinsville

Martin Truex, Jr

 

As the 2016 begins to wind down, there are now four races left, the hopes and dreams for some becomes a reality, while to some race teams and players as well, but for some the reality is” we will get them next year”!  The third segment money for the top five players is still in play!  Just to back up what I am saying, positions 1-5, the money paying positions are only separated by a total of seventeen (17) points with four races remaining.  That means that any of those five perople could easily be our segment winner!  Additionally, positions 5-9 are only separated by a total of of fourteen (14) points. Taking logic one step further, the first nine positions are separated bythirty-one (31) points!  With four races left that really measns that any of the top nine players could make a run towards the top and be successful in grabbing some money. Still another pocket of highly competitive players rest between positions 9 and 16.  That group of players are only separated by a sum total of thirteen (13) points.  So as you can see there are several pockets of really tight scores within the leaderboard!

The race for the Championship money is also still in play!  The top two scores are A&M Aggie Sue with 1,037 points and Edie The Las Vegas Super Star with 1,025 points and are in a tight second place. Sitting in third spo,t as of right now, is Carlton The Doorman with 1,009 points.  Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff is making a run to the top with a score of 1,001 points. Rounding out the top five scorers is Bobby Blue Crush with a total of 993 points.

 

Our Martinsville Picks

 

Once again we have a tie between two drivers with the biggest rooting section.

This week we have three players, A&M Aggie Sue, Dan The Numbers Cruncher, as well as Cole The On Demand Baseball Player, all hanging in the Martin Truex, Jr cheering section.  Additionally, we have Lonna The Quilt Angel, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey and Skid-Marc putting all their collective marbles in Kyle Busch’s marble sack at Martinsville.

We have five drivers that have a two person rooting section!

Leading of the list those five drivers alphbetically this week would be Kurt Busch.  His gang of two consists of Jerry The Buschwacker and Bernie The Bay Area Bandit. The subsitute driver for Dale Earnhardt, Jr., which this week is Jeff Gordon, has attracted Snoopy Dawn and Karen The Extremely Opinionated Southern Belle as supporters.  Freaky Fast Kevin Harvick has Zee, aka Sissy and Bobby Blue Crush as gest pit crewmemebers.  Meanwhile Linda The Cookie Mom aand Doug The Gandy Candy Man are riding shotgun with Matt Kenseth.  Lastly, Jim, aka Chiefy and Leon The Retired Airline Captain, Part-Time Cardiolgist and Strawberry Picker, as well as Your Most Humble Sheriff are all in with Kyle Larson this week.

Once again this week we have those independent thinkers, six in total, who really are totally in bidnez for themselves!

This is the last short track race of the year, and we all know what possiblities that brings!  At this point in the race season there very well could be some paybacks, lost lost tempers, bruised egos and most definitely some crumpled sheet metal, when the checkered flag flies at Martinsville!  Anyone taking bets?

I can only say that at the end of the race, with all the emotions that could be flying from all of the crewmembers ,“Love Hurts”!

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOOVES UP,FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

The Bay Area Bandit Stumbles But Remains At The Top

Joey Logano's helmet

 

Joey Logano, aka “:Sliced Bread”, survived a nerve-jangling overtime restart Sunday afternoon to win the Hellmann’s 500 at Talladega Superspeedway.

Logano powered the Team Penske No. 22 Ford to his second victory of the season, the 16th of his NASCAR Sprint Cup Series career and his second on the 2.66-mile Alabama track. Brian Scott scored a career-best second-place finish, with Denny Hamlin, Kurt Busch and Ricky Stenhouse Jr. rounding out the top five.

This was a very unusual Talladega race.  Without exception Talladega, as well as Daytona, will always produce massive crumpled sheet metal by the time the checkered flag flies.  However, that did not happen this time.  There were only three cars off the track and in the garage when the race ended, leaving 37 race cars racing when the checkered flag waved!  It is not that often that 37 cars can be driven into their respective haulers for the return trip to Charlotte!

 

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

The Talladega race saw three of our players score big, 44 points, when it was all said and done this week!  Carlton The Doorman, Jim, aka Chiefy, as well as Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude were riding shotgun with Joey Logano all race and grabbed the big number!

 

The Shakers and Movers

 

Not having the winner in her back pocket, but having a very nice race was A&M Aggie Sue, who scored a very respective 39 points for Denny Hamlin’s 3rd place finish.

Next on the scoring pylon is the duo of Carole, aka Rudy and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff who were betting the farm that Kurt Busch would be able to win his very first career restrictor plate race. The victory was not to happen but they did rally up with 37 points for “The Former Outaw’s” 4th palce finish.

All day long William Clyde Elliott, Jr,, aka Chase, rode within the top ten, additionally he led 9 laps during the middle of the race.  It was not his day to win his first Sprint Cup race. Nevertheless, Karen The Extremely Opinionated Southern Belle scooped up 30 points from his 12th place finish.

Rounding out the top five scores of the week is Bernie The Bay Area Bandit, who selected Paul Menard.  I am not sure where the heck that pick came from!  But when I saw that pick I had some thoughts that we may be instituting pre-season drug testing for all Redneck Fantasy League players next year!  Notwithstanding that issue, The Bay Area Bandit snagged 28 points with her selection of Menard.

After tallying up the scores this week, it would appear that, once again, the players were dropped into a food processor or blender and then poured out!  There were only two players who maintained their place on the totem pole after the race ended, our leader Bernie The Bay Area Bandit and Dan The Numbers Cruncher.  The remaining twenty players all traded places with somebodyomn the leaderboard!

By scoring 44 points this week Chiefy rocketed up the leaderboad seven (7) spots and landed himself in 7th place with just four races left in the season.

Sitting second on the movers list is the duo of Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff and Doug The Gandy Candy Dude.  The Ol Sheriff climbed up five (5) places to land just outside the top five money positions, sitting now in 6th place and just 10 points form some Redenck Fantasy League dollars!  Meanwhile, The Candy Man slithered down in the standings five (5) spots to sit in 8th place.

Rising from near extinction earlier in the segment is Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude.  The Edgy Dude stepped up four (4) places this week, landing in 14th place.

Rounding out the top five movers is a group of six players, A&M Aggie Sue, Carlton The Doorman, Bobby Blue Crush, Skid-Marc, Linda The Cookie Mom, as well as Jerry The Buschwacker each moved three (3) positions after the race.  Aggie Sue and The Doorman had a good afternoon slipping up in the standigns three polaces to reside in 2nd and 3rd, respectively.  However, Blue Crush, Skid-MarcThe Cookie Mom, as well as The Buschwacker all stumbled and fell three places sitting now in 5th, 12th, 13th, and 15th , respectively.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week we have one third of our fantasy league that will be sharing “The Crappiest Pick of The Week Award”!  I am not sure that we have ever had that kind of battle for this weekly award in our history!  There are seven (7) players who will be sharing this coveted award, Kathy The Church Forecloser, Jerry The Buschwacker, Linda The Cookie Mom, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, Dan The Numbers Dude, Skid-Marc, and Jeremy The Coach.

Speaking of Kathy The Church Forecloser, her microscopic 5 point total this week smartly steps back into, and in complete control of her familiar digs, “The Outhouse”!

S-A-L-U-T-E!!!

As the haulers load up and head back to Charlotte there are a four teams the have had their “river of dreams” destroyed and eight others teams who are all in for the next segment of The Chase, The Round of Eight!

With Talladega, the longest race track on the circuit, in the books NASCAR travels Northeast to the smallest track, Martinsville.

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACN’!

The Number 88 Has The Vote At Talladega

Dale Earnhardt Jr.

This week NASCAR makes its last trip to “sweet home Alabama” for 2016.  This is the biggest wild card race of the season.  Not only is this a wild car race, but it is also an elimination race for the round of 12!  The combination of these two facts really cranks up the angst and anxiety for the twelve drivers this weekend.

 

Our Talladega Picks

 

As the title suggests, this week the number 88 has the confidence of four players.  Those four players who will be rooting for Dale Earnhardt, Jr’s replacement, Alex Bowman, are Linda The Cookie Mom, Doug The Gandy Candy Dude, Skid-Marc, as well as Jeremy The Coach!

Following closely in popularity this week are three drivers, Joey Logano, Matt Kenseth, and “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keswelowski, each having a rooting section of three players each.  Betting the farm on Logano are Carlton The Doorman, Jim, aka Chiefy and Jason the Latent Tie Dye Hippie and All-Around Edgy Dude.

Dressing up in the Matt Kensenth fan garb this week are Lonna The Quilt Angel, Cole The On Demand Baseball Player, as well as David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey.

Kes’ cheerleading group comprises of Kathy The Church Forecloser, Jerry The Buschwacker, as well as Dan The Numbers Cruncher.  Each one is really hoping that their driver can deliver max points to them and begin their run towards the top of the leaderboard.

Meanwhile, there are two drivers who have a couple of players each in their corner for Talladega.  First up is Kurt Busch, who is supported by Carole, aka Rudy, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff.

Lastly, both Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Zee, aka Sissy will be crossing their fingers in hope of watching Carl Edwards drive his hot rod into Victory Lane and hoisting the hardware!

That leaves five players that are in bidnez for themselves this week!

As I mentioned in the opening paragraph of this post, the fall Talladega race is normally a very exciting race to watch, but now that NASCAR has gone to “the new playoff” system, this race has added another dimension to the already high level of tension to a restrictor plate race.

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

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