Could Larson Log Another Victory This Weekend At Bristol?

Kyle Larson

After a much needed week off from the rigors of the race track, NASCAR heads North from Charlotte to the “Tri-Ciies” area of Tennessee, which includes Bristol, Johnson City and Kingsport.  We are half way through the “short tack swing”, with only Richmond next week left in this sector of racing.  So far the tempers have been kept surprisingly in check, egos have not been too bruised and all weapons have been checked at the pit gate prior to each race!  I am not sure that the drivers can continue to play nice with each other.  Therefore, I wouldn’t be a bit surprised to see the hostilities erupt this week at Bristol and/or next week at Richmond.  I’m just saying!!!

Our Richmond Picks

 

It looks like the realities of 2017 is finally reflected in this week’s Redneck Fantasy League picks.  One fifth of the fantasy league, four players in total, have jumped on the  “Young Money” bandwagon!  Bernie The Bay Area Bandit, Skid-Marc, Jim, aka Chiefy, as well as Leon your Most Humble Sheriff are backing the MENCS points leader, Kyle Larson, this week at “The Last Great Colosseum”, aka Bristol.

There are two drivers that have a cheering squad of three players each.  The first of those two drivers, Matt Kenseth, has Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, Doug The Gandy Candy Man and A&M Aggie Sue are putting all their fortunes on the JGR No 20 Toyota this week.

Additionally Zee, aka Sissy, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Cole The Redneck Understudy are hoping that Chase Elliott will finally get the monkey off of his back and drive his NAPA Chevy into Victory Lane Sunday evening.

Lastly there are three drivers, this week, that have a rooting section of two players each.  Lonna The Quilt Angel and Kathy The Church Forecloser are pounding down the M&M’s and aggressively rooting for Kyle Busch to bring home the trophy.

Rooting for the elder Busch brother, Kurt, formally know as “The Outlaw” are Dan The Numbers Cruncher and “Recent Birthday Boy”, Carlton The Doorman!

Rounding out the rooting section this week is David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey and Jerry The Buschwacker, who are betting the farm that “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski can grab his third victory of the year.

Good luck to all!

As I alluded in the opening paragraph of this post, it would not surprise me at all to see somebody walking on “the fighting side of another driver” when the checkered flag flies!  But you just never know I could be totally wrong!  We could go through this short track swing without hostilities erupting and see “peace in our time”!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Linda The Cookie Mom Climbs To The Top Of The Leaderboard

Jimmie Johnson & David Ragan

The King of the mile and a half tracks just logged another victory on that length of track.  This was Jimmie Johnson’s 7th win at the Texas Motor Speedway and his 81st career NASCAR victory.  Mr. Seven-Time has just punched his ticket to the NASCAR playoffs!

Johnson surged to victory after starting at the rear of the field for the O’Reilly Auto Parts 500, christening Texas Motor Speedway’s new track surface with a win on the newly repaved and reconfigured race track.

Johnson led just 18 of the race’s 334 laps in the Hendrick Motorsports No. 48 Chevrolet, finishing 0.340 seconds ahead of runner-up Kyle Larson.  He started as “Tail Gun Charlie” at the rear of the field after a spin in Coors Light Pole Qualifying, which required the team to change tires before the green flag.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This week we have a trio of recipients, Jeremy The Coach, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, and a back-to-back recipient, Karen The Extremely Opinionated Southern Belle!  All three players were buckled in tight and riding shotgun with “The King of The Half Mile Tracks”, ol J.J.!  Having Johnson this week was good for 49 big points for this motley crew.

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Having a really big bounce back from last week’s disasterous 1 point race, . scored big this week!  Sissy probably feels like she hit the Lottery with “Young Money”, Kyle Larson rewarding her with 47 points at Texas.

Three players, Lonna The Quilt Angel, Linda The Cookie Mom and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey were feeling good after “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick powered his way to the lead pack very late in the race and delivered 44 points to his supporters.

Meanwhile ol Skid-Marc had another very good race.  Skidz was hanging out with “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski.  “Bad Brad” tossed him a bone to the tune of 40 points at Texas.

Rounding out the top five scorers this week is Snoopy Dawn.  Snoopy was really hoping that Martin Truex, Jr. could hold off the field when he took the lead around the 2/3 point of the race.  That wasn’t in the cards for Truex, but he still handed over 39 points to The Sneaky One!

The biggest movers of the week are a pair of divergently dissimilar players, Bobby Blue Crush and Kathy The Church Forecloser.  Both players plummeted in the standings like burned out meteor, dropping seven (7) places to land in 8th and 16th, respectively.

Conversely, both Jeremy The Coach and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey soared up five (5) positions to now reside in a tie for 8th and 14th, respectively.

Again another duo that  ping ponged around the scoring pylon this week.  Karen the Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, as was reported above, is a back-to-back Go Fast Fraternal member, and therefore recorded another great race weekend that propelled her up in the standings four (4) spots to 7th place. Even though Jim, aka Chiefy, rebounded with a significantly higher score this week, he continued his downward spiral at full throttle!  This week Chiefy fell and additional four (4) places landing in 10th spot.

Next up is the trio consisting of Linda The Cookie Mom, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Jerry The Buschwacker.  Both The Cookie Mom and the Las Vegas Super Star rose in the standings three (3) places to sit this week in 1st and 5th, respectively.  This is the first time in recent memory that The Cookie Mom has been sitting on to of the totem pole!

Rounding out the top five groups of movers are Carlton The Doorman and Carol, aka Rudy.  The Doorman krept up the leaderboard two places and Rudy stumbled down two places.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

The Crappiest Pick of The Week goes to Bobby Blue Crush.  Blue Crush was only able to manipulate one stinking point from his selection of Kasey Kahne!

We have a new Prince of The Poophouse this week.  After a short two week vacation Doug The Gandy Candy Man sent an eviction notice to Zee, aka Sissy and ousted her out of The Outhouse this week!

Next week the Cup teams are off and will be at home with their families celebrating Easter.

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVE UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN”!

Could It Be The Harvick And Johnson Show At Texas?

Kevin Harvick

As was witnessed last week NASCAR is in the midst of their East Coast “short track tour”.  It will cover two more of the next three weeks.  The only exception is that NASCAR is making a slight detour for a pit stop just outside Ft. Worth, TX.  This weekend it is the O’Reilly Auto Parts 500 at the Bruton Smith owned Texas Motor Speedway, within an earshot of DFW airport and even closer to the 1,198 acre Alliance Airport.  The Alliance Airport is a joint venture that is owned by the City of Ft. Worth and the Hillwood Development Company, one of many Ross Perot owned companies!  (A small history lesson!)

 

Our Texas Picks

This week we have a pair of drivers that are co-favorites to win, based on the choices of the Redneck Fantasy League players.  This could be billed as the Kevin and Jimmie Show, or the Harvick and Johnson Thrill Show, or since part of the winner’s loot is a pair of “six shooters”, it could be just billed as “The Largest Wild West Show” in the country!

Nevertheless, both Kevin Harvick and Jimmie Johnson have a rooting section of three players each.  Mr. Seven-Time has Jeremy The Coach, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, as well as Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle who all in at the sports betting window for Jimmie Johnson..

Likewise, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, Linda The Cookie Mom and Lonna the Quilt Angel are hoping that “Freaky Fast” Harvick can close the deal at TMS this weekend.

We also have two drivers that are carrying the votes of two players each.

Carole, aka Rudy and Kathy The Church Forecloser are holding the line for  “The Delivernator”, Denny Hamlin.  While both Jerry The Buschwacker and A&M Aggie Sue are teaming up to support the elder Busch brother, formally known as “The Outlaw”, currently, however, he is reverting back to his given name of Kurt!

Now those of you who are mathematicians, we have accounted for 10 players’ picks.  That leaves 11 players, more than half of the fantasy league, who are going solo this week and therefore are in bidnez for themselves!

Other than twice a year for NASCAR and once for IndyCar races, “does Ft. Worth ever cross your mind”?

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL UP YOUR GLOVES, FLIP DOWN YOUR VISOR, AND LET’ GO RACIN”!

Bobby Blue Crush Edges Into The Lead After Martinsville

Brad Keselowski

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)

In Sunday’s STP 500 Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series race at Martinsville Speedway, everything worked – but nothing more than Brad Keselowski’s race-winning No. 2 Ford.

Yes, that’s right, a Ford won at Martinsville. The car maker found Victory Lane at the .526-mile short track for the first time since Oct. 20, 2002, when Kurt Busch won at NASCAR’s oldest and smallest premier series track in a Roush Fenway Racing Ford.

Keselowski and runner-up Kyle Busch swapped the lead during the final 64-lap green-flag run, with Busch taking the point on Lap 444 of 500, and Keselowski powering back past Busch’s No. 18 Toyota on Lap 458. From that point, Keselowski pulled away to win by 1.806 seconds, as Busch lost the long-run speed he had demonstrated for most of the afternoon.

As always there was a fair amount of crumpled sheetmetal in the garage at this .526 mile “paperclip” as the Sun set in Martinsville.  Remember the old say that rings true for both Martinsville and Bristol, you are either in someone’s way, or someone is in your way!

There is just nowhere to run and nowhere to hide!

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This week the award goes to the only player who picked “Blazingly Bad” Brad to win the race, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle!  Added to her totals this week is a nifty 55 points!  Even though “Kes” was cited for a pit road violation early in the race, he was able to battle back to end up winning the race.

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Following The Opinionated One as the second highest points getters are Bobby Blue Crush and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff.  Both players were riding shotgun with “The Shrub”, Kyle Busch at Martinsville and pounding down handfuls of M&M’s all afternoon!  Along with their sugar high, they were rewarded handsomely with 52 points!

Meanwhile, Linda The Cookie Mom was hoping that Chase Elliott could sweep the Martinsville weekend with a Cup victory.  Having won the CWTS race on Saturday in a dominating fashion, Chase was unable to back that up on Sunday with another win.  Nevertheless, The Cookie Mom racked up 50 solid points today.

Carole, aka Rudy had an up and down afternoon with her driver. Joey Logano.  Early in the race he was down 2 laps from being involved in a couple of “dustups”.  But his Team Penske guys kept him in the ballgame and helped him rally back tor another good finish giving Rudy 33 points.

Rounding out the top five scorers for the week is a very motley quartet of players that includes Carlton The Doorman, Skid-Marc, Kathy The Church Forecloser and Cole The Redneck Understudy.  This foursome all scored 32 points apiece, but received their points by two different drivers.  Both The Doorman and The Redneck Understudy were awarded their points from Matt Kenseth, while Skidz and The Forecloser received their points from Jimmie Johnson.

This week is one of the rare weeks where the biggest scorer was also the single biggest mover of the week!  Yes sir, Karen The Extremely Opinionated One not only picked the winner, “Bad Brad”, but also rocketed up the scoring pylon eight (8) spots to 11th place, putting a large piece of real estate between her and “The Outhouse” this week!

Our resident dirt tracker, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, had a weekend that he may soon forget.  You see The Throttle Jockey thought that he had sure thing with Denny Hamlin.  The truth of the matter is that “The Hot Shoe” only received 16 points and slithered down the totem pole six (6) positions to land in 19th place.  That, my friends puts him in the hunt soon for “The Outhouse” award!!

The third largest movers were two of the three Hammack Brothers.  Both Jim, aka Chiefy and Jerry The Buschwacker failed to have a decent outing at Martinsville. Chiefy and The Buschwacker both plummeted five (5) places to reside now in 6th and 10th, respectively.  If you remember correctly Chiefy was our points leader last week.

Likewise, Snoopy Dawn stumbled and fell down four (4) rungs on the ladder this week sitting in a tie with Jeremy The Coach in13th place.

Round out the top five movers this week is still another strangely mismatched quartet, Bobby Blue Crush, Linda The Cookie Mom, Lonna The Quilt Angel, and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff.  All four players are clicking their heels and are happy campers because they all elevated their positions by three (3) spots.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week we have two players who will be receiving and sharing “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award.  Both Jim, aka Chiefy and his sister Zee, aka Sissy could only muster one (1) microscopic point at Martinsville.  We all know that if you only get a single digit score for your total for a race, you are most likely in the running for “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award!

We have a new “Ogre of The Outhouse”, a new “Princess of The Poophouse”, a new “Occupant in The Outhouse” this week, Zee, aka Sissy!  She served notice to Doug The Gandy Candy Man and flat out evicted him!  However, The Candy Man is only one skinny point away from re-taking possession of The Outhouse!

Next week the haulers head out to Ft. Worth, Texas for the weekend!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN”!

 

An Historic Return To Martinsville

Kyle Larson

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)

This week NASCAR returns to one of its original race tracks, and there will a huge celebration to celebrate Martinsville Speedway’s 70th anniversary.  That’s right the very first race at this track was held in 1947!  That means that this race track is older than many of the players who are in The Redneck Fantasy League, However, we do have a few players who may be racing Martinsville in the age department!

If you are missing a little Martinsville history I can help you out.

 

Our Martinsville Picks

 

As we all know Kyle Larson thoroughly dominated the field last week at Auto Club Speedway in Fontana, and we picked our first segment picks back in the middle of February, so it is quite intriguing that Larson is the favorite this week at Martinsville!  The rooting section for “Young Money” includes Doug The Gandy Candy Man, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Dan The Numbers Cruncher, as well as Jeremy The Coach.

Meanwhile, Snoopy Dawn, Jerry The Buschwacker and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey are backing “The Delivernator”, Denny Hamlin.

Then there are three drivers that are carrying a rooting section of two players each to Martinsville for the 70th anniversary celebration.  Skid-Marc and Kathy The Church Forecloser think that Mr. Seven-Time, Jimmie Johnson, will come to life this week and emerge from his early season funk.

Additionally, Carlton The Doorman and Cole The Redneck Understudy are hoping that, like Johnson, Matt Kenseth will climb out of the darkness of the first five races and put his JGR Camry into Victory Lane Sunday.

Lastly, Bobby Blue Crush and Leon The Retired Airline Captain, Part-Time Cardiologist as well as a Strawberry Picker, Former Elephant Driver, and Your Most Humble Sheriff feel strongly that now that Kyle Busch has recovered from getting his head thumped at Las Vegas, he may be able to show the rest of the field the way to the checkered flag at Martinsville this week.

And as we have seen from time to time we have a rather large contingent, eight players, of independent thinkers who are most definitely in bidnez for themselves!

This is the first visit to one of NASCAR’s short track bullrings.  Most likely there will be at least one driver leaving this track with his ego bruised, his temper lost, his car reduced to a pile of crumpled sheet metal, and wanting to thump a melon or two!  Additionally, this race track is a great place to extract some revenge for anything that may have happened in the first five races, or last last year, or for that matter in the last decade!  So there could be some underlying anger that gets vented on Sunday!

In other words, after the race there could be some drivers who loose their tempers, do something that they know that they shouldn’t have done, and later on in hindsight, and in the words of Taylor Swift, wished that they were “a better man”!

Good luck to all this week!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’ GO RACIN’!

Chiefy Slips Into the Lead After Auto Club Speedway

Kyle Larson

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)

For three straight weeks “Young Money”, Kyle Larson, finished as the bride’s maid- not the bride. This week at Fontana, the 24-year-old California native fended off a bevy of challengers in the final laps of the Auto Club 400, holding on to capture his first victory of the season and his first victory at Auto Club Speedway.

Larson, who started on the pole and led a race-high 110 laps, took the lead on the final restart with two laps remaining in the overtime 202-lap race, vaulting past other contenders for his second career victory.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

Well, this week The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast award goes to Jerry The Buschwacker.  He was the only player who saw the handwriting on the wall, choosing the 2017 Ultimate Bridesmaid, Young Money, to win the race at Auto Club Speedway.  For that foresight he gathered up 59 points!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Skid-Marc and Lonna The Quilt Angel came away from Fontana smelling like a rose.  Both were riding shotgun with the Stage #2 winner, Martin Truex, Jr., which gave them 52 points added to their five race total.

There were seven players, one third of the fantasy league, that racked up 39 points this week.  Bobby Blue Crush, Jim, aka Chiefy, A&M Aggie Sue, Linda The Cookie Mom, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff all were rooting for Joey “Sliced Bread” Logano. While Bernie The Bay Area Bandit received her 39 points from hanging with “The Shrub”, Kyle Busch.

There was a quartet of players who scored 36 points from “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski.  Those four players include Jeremy The Coach, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, Carole, aka Rudy, as well as Snoopy Dawn.

Dragging up the tail end of the list of high scorers this week is none other than  Dan The Numbers Cruncher!  The Numbers Dude was rolling with Denny Hamlin this weekend and added 26 points to his segment total.

Once again there was widespread movement within the scoring pylon this week.  The only players who held serve were, Snoopy Dawn, Jeremy The Coach and our semi permanent cellar dweller so far, The Gandy Candy Man.  The rest of the contingency of fantasy league players traded places.

The single largest mover was Kathy The Church Forecloser who plummeted eight (8) spots, falling out of the to five and all the way down to 11th place.

On the other hand, Jerry The Buschwacker rocketed up seven (7) positions to land in 5th place this week.

Our resident dirt tracker, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey stumbled, bumbled and fumbled his way down six (6) spots crashing down in 13th place.

There was trio of players who moved five (5) positions this week.  Both Lonna The Quilt Angel and Skid-Marc stepped up five (5) places to sit now in 10th and 14th, respectively.  However, Cole The Redneck Understudy slithered down the totem pole five spots to reside now in 18th place.

Lastly, Zee, aka Sissy, stubbed her toes and fell four (4) places and now sits on the door steps of The Outhouse in 20th place!

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week one of our players, who last week was resting quite comfortably in the top five, receives “The Crappiest Pick of The Week Award” with high distinction! Kathy The Church Foreclose was only able to scratch out a meagerly one (1) point total!  For that she wins, hands down, this weekly award!

Once again this week Doug The Gandy Candy Man rules “The Outhouse” with really no viable challenge from any of the other twenty players!  He has 23 point advantage or lead on his closet competitor!

As the sunsets in the west, NASCAR closes the door on its Western Swing and leaves California in the rear view mirror.  No doubt there are some who are still “California Dreamin” as they board their flights back to Charlotte!  One driver in particular that is dreaming is “Young Money”, Kyle Larson!

Meanwhile, it is off to the bullring of Martinsville, VA next week.

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’ GO RACIN’!

Joey Logano Is Raring To Hit Auto Club Speedway

Joey Logano

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)

After two exciting races at Las Vegas and Phoenix, NASCAR culminates its Western Swing with a weekend race in Fontana, CA, the Auto Club 400.  It is also an opportunity for the West Coast drivers to connect with some of their family and friends early in the season.  More importantly some of the race teams may be soaking up a little sun and beach action on their down time prior to the race weekend.

 

Our Auto Club Speedway Picks

 

Nearly one third of the fantasy league is behind one of the Team Penske drivers, Joey “Slice Bread” Logano, this week.  This week Bobby Blue Crush, Jim, aka Chiefy, A&M Aggie Sue, Linda The Cookie Mom, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, and yours truly, Leon The Most Humble Sheriff are all rallying behind the 2016 Daytona 500 winner this week.  The Fords have been very strong both in qualifying and during the race so far this season.  Can Logano seal the deal this week in SoCal?

There is another Ford driver that has a large contingency of rooters this week.  Four players, Snoopy Dawn, Carole, aka Rudy, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as Jeremy The Coach, are grouping together to support “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski in hopes that he can log his second victory of the season.

There are two drivers that have a rooting section of two players each.

Lonna The Quilt Angel and Skid-Marc are hoping that Martin Truex, Jr’s can put his Toyota Camry back into the winner’s circle for the second time in the last three weeks.

Lastly, both Zee, aka Sissy and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey think that Mr. Seven-Time, Jimmie Johnson, will drive his Hendrick Motorsports Chevy into victory Lane and hoist up the hardware!

For those counting, those players mentioned above total fourteen (14) players.  That means that there are seven (7) players who are in bidnez for themselves this week!

Good luck to al this week!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’ GO RACIN’!

Carlton The Doorman Lengthens His Lead Ever So Slightly

Ryan Newman

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)

Staying out on old tires for a two-lap overtime run at Phoenix Raceway, Ryan Newman pulled away when eventual fourth-place finisher Ricky Stenhouse Jr. (who stayed out during the final caution) and runner-up Kyle Larson (who pitted for two tires) got together in the first corner after the final restart on Lap 313.

Newman’s 18th career victory was his second at Phoenix but his first since he won the Brickyard 400 on July 28, 2013, driving for Stewart-Haas Racing. The win was RCR’s first since Kevin Harvick took the checkered flag on Nov. 10, 2013 at Phoenix before departing for Stewart-Haas the following year.  Newman broke his 127 race winless streak by winning the Camping World 500 at PIR.

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This week Bobby Blue Crush stand as the sole recipient of this weekly award.  Kilimanjaro Bobby boldly went where no man or woman dared to go selecting “No Neck” Ryan Newman to win the race, and was rewarded 42 points.

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

With the new point system that NASCAR has come up, stage racing for points, with the points for winning races, not always will the race winner be the highest scorer of the race!  Such was the case this week.  Kyle Busch scored the most points this week logging 47 pints.  That is great news for David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, A&M Aggie Sue, as well as Snoopy Dawn.

Both Kathy The Church Forecloser and  Bernie The Bay Area Bandit racked up a tidy sum, 46 points, while participating in the Brad Keselowski “Ride Along Program” at Phoenix!

Bobby Blue Crush hit one out of the park choosing Ryan Newman at Phoenix.  However, Blue Crush was not the highest scorer, but did log 42 points!

Cole The Redneck Understudy pick the old standby, Mr. Seven-Time, Jimmie Johnson, as was not let down.  Even though Johnson started deep in the field when the green flag flew, he sliced and diced his way through the field to be a factor when the checkered flag fell, producing 38 points.

Rounding out the top five scorers for the week is Linda The Cookie Mom.  The Cookie Mom was another player who was way out there on the limb picking Jamie McMurray, and it paid off handsomely for her with 33 points.

Only five players held serve and remained in their previous positions after the Phoenix race ended.  That means the 16 players switched places when the Sun set in Phoenix.

Leading the charge of movement this week is Zee, aka Sissy who plummeted eleven (11) spots, resting in 16th place.

Both Jerry The Buschwacker and Carole, aka Rudy saw their star fall from grace tumbling seven (7) spots sitting now in 14th and 18th, respectively.

Both David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey and Snoopy Dawn moved up six (6) places to sit in 7th and 9th, respectively.

There is a trio of players that moved five (5) places this week.  Cole The Redneck Understudy climbed up on the totem pole to sit in 13th place.  Meanwhile, both Jerry The Buschwacker and Skid-Marc slid down five spots resting in 12th and 19 places, respectively.

Rounding out this list is Bobby Blue Crush who moved up five (5) spots and sits in 6th place this week

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

Winning “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” this week will most assuredly be your fate if you only scored a single digit and this week Zee, aka Sissy is the only player that fits this description!

By only scoring 12 points this week, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, assured himself at least one more week in “The Outhouse”!

Next week NASCAR continues moving west to Fontana,CA and the Auto Club Speedway.

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN”!

Can Harvick Rule Again At Phoenix?

Kevin Harvick and Daniel Suarez

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)
This week the NASCAR circus moves from Las Vegas 299.7 miles to the Southeast and unload their hot rods in The Valley of The Sun, which includes  the Phoenix International Raceway in Avondale, AZ.  This is the second stop on the 2017 NASCAR Western Swing and promises to be a very exciting race weekend at this 1 mile bullring.

 

Our Phoenix Picks

 

It appears that some of our players have done their homework.  After checking out some stats it shows that “Freaky Fast Kevin Harvick” has won 6 of the last 9 races at PIR!  With a total of 6 of the 21 players, nearly 1/3 of the group, that have put all their marbles into Kevin Harvick’s marble sack this weekend! Those six players hanging with Harvick include Dan The Numbers Cruncher, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Jim,aka Chiefy, Jerry The Buschwacker, Karen The Extremely Opinionated Southern Belle, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff.

Snoopy Dawn, A&M Aggie Sue, as well as David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey are hoping that the “not so Rowdy” Kyle Busch has recovered from an ill timed confrontation with Joey Logano and the entire Team Penske pit crew and could possibly lead the pact to the checkered flag Sunday.

Likewise, there are three players, Carole, aka Rudy, Doug The Gandy Candy Man and Skid-Marc who are backing the elder Busch brither formally known as “Outlaw”, Kurt.  All three players are hoping that the 2017 Daytona 500 winner can find Victory Lane at PIR.

Lastly, Kathy The Church Forecloser and Bernie The Bay Area Bandit are hoping that “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski can grab his second victory of the season.

That leaves a large group, seven players in all, that are in bidnez for themselves this week!

By the time I get to Phoenix you will be reading this post!  Because once again I will be hanging out in the media center, garage and pit road for the weekend!

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Carlton The Doorman Rockets Into The Lead After Vegas

Martin Treux,Jr.

(photo courtesy Leon Hammack)
In a race whose aftermath left hometown driver Kyle Busch with a bloody forehead, Martin Truex Jr. passed the faltering car of Brad Keselowski on the white-flag lap and cruised to a sweep of all three stages in Sunday’s Kobalt 400 at Las Vegas Motor Speedway.

As Truex approached the checkered flag to win a Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series race for the first time this season and the first time at LVMS, Joey Logano’s Ford slid up into Kyle Busch’s Toyota in a battle for third position. Busch spun into the inside wall on pit road and limped across the finish line in 22nd place.

Things changes so “fast” in the last two laps!

The Fraternal Order Of The Go Fast

 

We have two players who selected Martin Truex, Jr. this week to win the Kobalt 400, Carlton The Doorman and Zee, aka Sissy.  This duo really came out of Vegas big winners with a nifty 60 points added to their grand totals!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

A trio of players, Jim, aka Chiefy, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff banded together to support the only beerwagon in the field today, the Miller Lite Ford driven by “Blazingly Bad” Brad Kesekowski.  It looked like Keselowski was going to bring the field to the checkered flag, but his luck soured this week, his hot rod faltered, and Truex powered past him for the win.  Nevertheless, these three players grabbed 48 points.

Both Kathy The Church Forecloser and Dan The Numbers Cruncher were riding shotgun with “Sliced Bread”, Joey Logano all day long.  I wonder if they too were backing Logano during the pit road melee that broke out between ol  “Rowdy” and “Sliced Bread”?  No matter what their allegiance was, these two racked up 39 points for the race.

A&M Aggie Sue logged 31 points while rooting on Denny Hamlin today.

Rounding out the top five scorers for the week are Cole The Redneck Understudy, Jeremy The Coach, Skid-Marc, Carole, aka Rudy and Linda the Cookie Mom.  All five scored 18 points and were backing ol “Rowdy” Kyle Busch today.

Editor’s Note:  After Kyle’s pit road show he might want to drop the “Rowdy” as his nickname1  He didn’t appear to be able to back up and or “hold his mud” against the pit crew of the Team Penske No.22 Ford.  He, “Rowdy”, made one fatal error in judgement.  Never start something when there are more of them than there is of you!!!  It is a basic math problem of addition and subtraction!

With NASCAR’s new point system our standings resemble a fruit smoothy or, for that matter, anything else that comes out of a blender!

The single biggest mover this week was Zee, aka Sissy who catapulted up fifteen (15) spots from a tie in The Outhouse to land in 5th place!

We have two players that also moved double digit numbers.  Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff climbed up the scoring totem pole eleven (11) positions, vacating his half of The Outhouse this week to rest comfortably in a tie for ninth place with Bobby Blue Crush.  Meanwhile, Snoopy Dawn crumbled and slid down the scoring pylon eleven (11) spots landing in 15th place.

Edie The Las Vegas Super Star had a very celebratory race at Las Vegas stepping up ten (10) positions to sit in third place.  David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey didn’t fair so well at Vegas, falling ten (10) places to land in 13th place.

Killimanjaro Bobby slithered down the totem pole eight (8) places this week, falling from the leader to sitting now in on 9th place.

Lastly, there are three players who moved around six places.  Both Kathy The Church Forecloser and Dan The Numbers Dude moved up six (6) places to reside in 4th and 12th, respectively.  Unfortunately, Lonna The Quilt Angel did not have a good Sunday this week.  The Quilt Angel fell six (6) positions and now sits in 16th place.

This week the standings just changed so “fast”!

 

Straight From The Outhouse

 

Once again we have a tie for The Crappiest Pick of The Week.  Snoopy Dawn, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as Bernie The Bay Area Bandit all were hanging out with “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick this week. That early exit from the race earned these players just one (1) microscopic point this week, and shares in The Crappiest Pick of The Week award!

This week our man Doug the Gandy Candy Man is the lone occupant of The Outhouse!

Next week NASCAR travels 299.7 miles Southeast to the Phoenix International Raceway

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Skip to toolbar