Your Most Humble Sheriff Lengthens His Lead After Talladega

Brad Keselowski
On the Longest Day at Talladega—in a war of attrition that required three red flags and left 14 cars running at the finish—Brad Keselowski powered his No. 2 Team Penske Ford past the No. 31 Chevrolet of Ryan Newman on the final lap to win Sunday’s Alabama 500 at Talladega Superspeedway.

Two laps after the final restart on Lap 186 of 188, Keselowski and teammate Joey Logano ganged up on Newman, who held the runner-up position after Keselowski shot past him. Trevor Bayne ran third in a damaged No. 6 Ford, with Logano and Aric Almirola finishing fourth and fifth, respectively.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This week both Carlton The Doorman and A&M Aggie Sue were riding shotgun with “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski“Bad Brad” was able to snatch the victory away from Ryan Newman, and thus reward these two players with 59 points each!

 

The Shakers and Movers

 

Following The Doorman and Aggie Sue on the scoring pylon is Zee, aka Sissy, gathering up 42 points from Joey Logano’s 4th place finish.

Lining up in third place on the weekly scoring chart is David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey adding 35 points to his totals this week from Ryan Newman’s 2nd place finish.

Meanwhile, Linda The Cookie Mom, Cole The Redneck Understudy, Jim, aka Chiefy, as well as Your Most Humble Sheriiff, were all hoping that Dale Earnhardt, Jr. would make his last appearance at Talladega as a full time Cup driver count and add to his legacy at facility.  But it was not to be Sunday.  Nevertheless, Dale Jr. did grab an 8th place finish and reward these four with 30 points.

Rounding out the to five this week is Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, Kathy The Church Forecloser, ol Skid-Marc, as well as Dan The Numbers Cruncher.  All of these players were riding with Chase Elliott at Talladega and were rewarded with 28 points.

Only four players remained in their previous weeks positions, the top three, Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff, Carol, aka Rudy, Doug The Gandy Candy Dude, as welll as ol Skid-Marc.

The single biggest mover in week seven is Carlton The Doorman, rocketing up the scoring pylon six (6) places to land in 5th place.

Following closely behind is A&M Aggie Sue, who climbed up the totem pole five (5) spots to sit in 8th place after the checkered flag flew at Talladega.

Jerry The Buschwacker, however, did not fare so well dropping four (4) places to rest in 19th place, only 13 points from “The Outhouse”!  It would appear that he is getting all his ducks in a row and making a late segment run for “The Outhouse”!

Next is a trio of players consisting of Jeremy The Coach, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Zee, aka Sissy, who all moved three (3) places after the race ended at Talladega.  Sissy climbed up three places to sit in 14th place, while Jeremy The Coach and Edie The Las Vegas Super Star slid down three places to occupy 10th and 14th, respectively.

Rounding out the top five movers of the week is a group of five players that includes Snoopy Dawn, Bobby Blue Crush, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, Linda The Cookie Mom and Bernie The Bay Area Bandit.  Both The Throttle Jockey and The Cookie Mom stepped up their game and climbed up two (2) places to sit in 16th and 18th, respectively.  But Snoopy, Blue Crush and The Bay Area Bandit all lost the draft and slid down two spots to reside in 6th, 11th and 21st, respectively.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

We have a four player tie this week for “The Crappiest Pick of The Week”!  This gaggle of players includes Carole, aka Rudy, Snoopy Dawn, Jerry The Buschwacker and Bernie The Bay Area Bandit.  All four players logged a mere 12 points this week!  We salute this fine group!

We have a “Princess of The Poophouse” this week!  This is a real gasser, not only did The Bay Area Bandit share in “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award, but she did so poorly that her performance landed her securely into “The Outhouse” this week, evicting Dan The Numbers Dude!

 

Next week NASCAR rolls into the heartland of America and the Kansas Speedway, for yet another race at a mile and a half race track.  Kansas is the elimination race for the Round of 12, and for those four drivers that are facing elimination it really “cuts like a knife”!

TIL NEXT TIME, I AM STILL WORKING ON MY REDNECK!

We Have A Mixed Bag At Talladega

Dale Earnhardt, Jr.

This  week the NASCAR circus heads south from Charlotte to The Deep South.  More specifically the haulers are heading down to the Talladega Superspeedway!

We have a three way tie for the most support for this race with two Juniors, Dale Earnhardt, Jr. and William Clyde Elliott, Jr. (better known as Chase) and Kyle Busch at the top of the list.  Since this is the last resrtictor plate race of the 2017 season, and it is also Dale Earnhardt Jr’s last race at Talladega, additionally I do run this fantasy league, therefore, it is this Redneck’s perrogative to put the picture of my favorite driver, The Pied Piper of Restrictor Plate Racing, up as the photo leading into this article!  LOL!!

 

Our Talladega Choices

 

We have three drivers who have a cheering section of four players each for Talladega.

This week Jim, aka Chiefy, Cole The Redneck Understudy, Linda The Cookie Mom, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff are backing Dale Earnhardt, Jr., for the last time, at a track where he has ten career victories.  Could this be Junior’s last hurrah and his last great chance to grab a victory in his last race at, what arguably could be “The Earnhardt House”?  If that were to happen JUNIOR NATION woudl bring the house down, for sure!

Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, Kathy The Church Forecloser, ol Skid-Marc, as well as Dan The Numbers Dude are steadfastly banking that Chase Elliott will notch his first MENCS victory at Talladega.  It has been widely noted that Elliott would love to be the second NASCAR driver to win a race in the No.24, Jeff Gordon being the only driver to win in the No.24 in NASCAR history!

The last driver to have a rooting section of four players is Kyle Busch.  His four supporters include Carole, aka Rudy, Snoopy Dawn, Jerry The Buschwacker, as well as Bernie The Bay Area Bandit,

There are two drivers who have a pair of rooters in their corner.  Lonna The Quilt Angel and Doug The Gandy Candy Man are banking that the driver formally known as “The Outlaw”, now known by his given name, Kurt Busch, can put an exclamation point on his 2017 season and hoist the hardware Sunday.

Likewise, “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski has the backing of Carlton The Doorman and A&M Aggie Sue Sunday.

Relying on my basic math skills would indicate that we have five players who are going it alone, and we all know what that means.  What it really means is that those independent players are really in bidnez for themselves!

On a personal note, a few years ago me and ol Chiefy were fortunate enough to make this October Talladega race three years in a row.  I can stillremember the first time that I parked the car and gazed over at the race track!

I thought to myself:

When the winds go cold and it blows October,
I think about us shoulder to shoulder,
Like those cars my thoughts roll over and over and over,
In my mind

Tonight I’m in Talladega,

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’ GO RACIN”!

Your Most Humble Sheriff Hangs On To A Slim Lead

Martin Truex, Jr.

Martin Truex Jr. kicked off the Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series Round of 12 with a flourish, notching his second win of the postseason Sunday at Charlotte Motor Speedway.

Truex’s Furniture Row Racing No. 78 Toyota led 91 of 337 laps to win the Bank of America 500, the fourth of 10 playoff races for the series. Truex survived a pair of late-race restarts and an overtime finish to secure his sixth victory of the season, his second at the 1.5-mile track and the 13th of his Monster Energy Series career.

The triumph gave Truex automatic advancement into the next three-race elimination series, the Round of 8. He leads the postseason standings by a sizable margin thanks to his proficiency in collecting playoff points through stage wins, race victories and his regular-season championship.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

This week we have four players who share this weekly award.  Doug The Gandy Candy Man, Cole The Redneck Understudy, Snoopy Dawn, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff were all hanging tight with the hottest NASCAR driver of 2017, Marin Truex, Jr.  The quartet all racked up a timely 47 points this week!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Even though there was a quartet of players who selected Martin Truex, Jr. to win the race, they were not the highest scorers of the week.  No, as hapens from time to time, the winner of the race was not be the highest scoring driver of the race.  This week Carole, aka Rudy, was betting the farm on Chase Elliott, and she was rewarded very nicely. Ol Chase had a couple of good stage results to go with his 2nd place race finish, and that yielded Rudy 53 points!

As was mentioned above, the four drivers that were riding on the Truex Train at Charlotte, The Candy Man, The Redneck Understudy, Snoopy and The Old Sheriif were the second highest scorers of the week with 47 points.

Having another very good week was Jerry The Buschwacker, logging 43 points from Denny Hamlin’s 4th place finish.

Both Skid-Marc and Jeremy The Coach fared well this week grabbing 38 points from “Young Money“, Kyle Larson’s, strong stage results and his 10th place finish.

Rounding out the top five scorers this week is the duo of Carlton The Doorman and Bobby Blue Crush.  Both players racked up a nice score of 34 points from Jimmie Johnson’s 7th place finish.

Once again there was quite a bit of movement from within the leaderboard, fifteen players slid around in the standings.  Although there wa no change in the first three positions, Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff, Carole, aka Rudy, and Doug The Gandy Candy Man remained in their pervious spots.  Likewise the same could be said for Jim, aka Chiefy, Zee, aka Sissy and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey.  After basic math one could deduct that there were fifteen (15) players who either moved up or down this week!

This week the highest movers happens to be a mismatched trio that moved five (5) positions.  Both Jerry The Buschwacker and Kathy The Church Forecloser rose to the ocassion and climbed up the totem pole five spots to sit in in 15th and 16, respectively.  However, Dan The Numbers Cruncher wasn’t so frotunate this week.  No, in fact The Numbers Dude slithered down the totem pole all the way to the very base of it, to 21st place, and forcefully evicted The Church Forecloser out of her warm fuzzy place in “The Outhouse”!

There is a trio who moved four (4) spots after the checkered flag flew at Charlotte.  This trio includes Lonna The Quilt Angel, A&M Aggie Sue and Bernie The Bay Area BanditThe Quilt Angel stepped up to sit 6th on the leaderboard this week, while Aggie Sue and The Bay Area Bandit plummeted four spots down the scoring pylon to rest now in 13th and 19th, respectively.

Only one player moved three (3) spots this week, Cole The Redneck UnderstudyThe Redneck Understudy climbed up the pylon to hang out this week in 12th position.

Both Kilimanjaro Bobby and Edie The Las Vegas Super Star dropped down two (2) places to hang out in 9th and 10 respectively.

Six players, Snoopy Dawn, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southen Belle, Jeremy The Coach, Carlton The Doorman, ol Skid-Marc and Linda The Cookie Mom all moved just one position this week.  Snoopy, The Doorman, and Skid-Marc moved up one place to sit now in 4th, 11th and 12th.  But The Highly Opinionated One, The Coach and The Cookie Mom all fell one spot this week resting in 5th, 7th and 20th, respectively.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week we have one player who takes both of the awards that are given out in this section of the post!  It is not that often that it comes out that way, however it surely did this week.  Dan The Numbers Cruncher barely eeked out “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award!  The Numbers Dude could only muster a score of 10 points from Clint Bower this week.  But nonetheless, he racked up the smallest amount of points this week, just barely beating out Bernie The Bay Area Bandit who could only add 11 points to her totals this week!

Those microscopic 10 points scored by The Numbers Dude was enough to plummet him right into “The Outhouse”, and serve an eviction notice to Kathy The Church Forecloser!

Next week NASCAR makes a return to the deep south, to “Sweet Home Alabama”, specifically to Talladega, where the playing field is level and anyone can win that race!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Martin Truex, Jr. Has The Confidence Of Many This Week

Martin Teuex,Jr.

With the race at Charlotte this weekend we are coming up to the halfway point of the third segment.  Where did this season go, my firends?  Here we are already in the first week of October and well into the 2017 playoffs.  It will not be too long before thsi season comes to a conclusion and a champions crowned at Homestead.

 

Our Charlotte Selections

 

It should be no surprise that one of the most dominate drivers for this season, Martin Truex, Jr., is the choice of one fifth of the fantasy leage this week.  Among his supporters this week are Kathy The Church Forecloser, Snoopy Dawn, Cole The Redneck Understudy, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff who are betting that Truex can parlay another victory and punch his ticket to the round of 8.

Likewise, Bobby Blue CrushCarlton The Doorman, as welll as Karen The Highly Opinionated Southen Belle are hanging with Mr. Seven-Time, Jimmie Johnson this weekend.These three players must think that since the playoffs are heating up, they are betting that Johnson is doing the same.

We also have three drivers that have a support group of two players each  on their sides at Charlotte.

Even though Kurt Busch has cooled of very significantly since his victory in the Daytona 500, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey are fully supporting him this weekend.

Similarly, Lonna The Quilt Angel and Carole, aka Rudy and are really hoping that Chase Elliott can finally brak through and secure a victory for the HMS No. 24 team at Charlotte Sunday evening.

Lastly, A&M Aggie Sue and Bernie The Bay Area Bandit are putting all oftheir mabls into Joey Logano’s marble sack.

With the passing of rock icon, Tom Petty this week, as well as the playoffs starting the Round of 12 at Charlotte, there are 12 driver that are “running down a dream”!

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Your Most Humble Sheriff Is Still On Top Of The Totem Pole

Kyle Busch

Kyle Busch stormed past Chase Elliott on the next-to-last lap Sunday at Dover International Speedway, posting his fourth Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series victory of the year as the Playoffs field was chopped from 16 to 12 drivers.

Busch’s Joe Gibbs Racing No. 18 Toyota led four times for 30 laps in the Apache Warrior 400, the last event in the three-race Round of 16. His third Dover win was the 42nd victory in his premier-series career.

Elliott led a race-high 138 laps, seeking a breakthrough victory in his 70th premier series start. But his Hendrick Motorsports No. 24 Chevrolet faded down the stretch, ending up .357 seconds behind Busch as the runner-up.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

Nobody selected Kyle Busch this week so this award goes back to the vault!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

This week we have a foursome that racked up 50 much needed points choosing Martin Truex, Jr., and thus were our highest scorers.  That foursome consists of Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Carole, aka Rudy, Jerry The Buschwacker and Dan The Numbers Dude.

Both Snoopy Dawn and Doug The Ageless Sprint Car Driver were very vociferously hoping that Chase Elliott could have held off “Rowdy” for just one more lap to grab his first MENCS victory.  But alas, they had to settle for the 47 points they received for his second place finish.

The quartet of Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, Lonna The Quilt Angel, A&M Aggie Sue, as well as David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey added 40 points to their 3rd segment totals.  The Highly Opinionated One racked up her points from “Blazing Bad” Brad Keselowski’s 10th place finish.  While The Quilt Angel, Aggie Sue and The Throttle Jockey were all riding shotgun with Mr. Seven-Time, Jimmie Johnson.

There are five players, Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff, Cole The Redneck Understudy, ol skid-Marc, Zee, aka Sissy and Jeremy The Coach that logged 32 points via Clint Bowyer’s 6th place finish.

Round out the top five scorers is Kathy The Church Forecloser with 25 points from Erik Jones’ 12 place finish.

Because of the closeness of the scores within the fantasy league, there was a vast amount of movement this week!  Only three players, Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff, Zee, aka Sissy and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey remained in their previous positions.

The two largest movers this week comes from the same household, Jim, aka Chiefy and Edie The Las Vegas Super Star.  Both Chiefy and The Las Vegas Super Star moved eight (8) places this week, and that is where the similarities ended.The Las Vegas Super Star rocketed up eight spots to sit in 8th place.  However, Chiefy didn’t fare quite as good,  Ol Chiefy plummeted from 6th place to fall all the way down to 14th this week!

Bobby Blue Crush, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit ,and Linda The Cookie Mom suffered the same consequences, each tumbling five (5) places to rest in 7th, 15th and 19th, respectively.

Conversely, Dan The Numbers Cruncher had a smokin’ hot Sunday further positioning himself North and upwind of “The Outhouse” four (4) places to reside in 16th place!

Next there is trio consisting of Snoopy Dawn, Lonna The Quilt Angel and  Carlton The Doorman who all moved three (3) spots this week.  Both Snoopy and The Quilt Angel elevated their position on the leaderboard by three places to sit in 5th and 10th, respectively.  However, Carlton The Doorman wasn’t nearly that lucky.  No, The Doorman stumbled and fell three places to rest now 12th position.

Rounding out the top five movers this week is a quintet consisting of Carole, aka Rudy, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, A&M Aggie Sue, Ol Skid-Marc and Kathy The Church Forecloser.  Four out of the five players had positive results today.  Those four moving up the scoreboard are Rudy, The Candy Man, Aggie Sue and ol Skid-Marc now sitting in 2nd, 3rd, 8th and 13th, respectively.  The Church Forecloser slid down the totem pole to return to one of her most familiar digs, “The Outhouse”!

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

This week we have two players who get to share “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award.  Both Jim, aka Chiefy and Bobby Blue Crush were rooting for “The Delivernator”, Denny Hamlin.  However, Hamlin could only muster a 35th place finish and that yielded only 8 points for both of these players.

Even though Kathy the Church Forecloser was our 5th highest scorer this week, and logged 25 points, it was not enough to keep her from securing her place back in a place that she has visited a time or two this year “The Outhouse”!

Since Dover was an elimination race for the Round of 16 the bottom four drivers in points were eliminated after the checkered flag flew.  Additionally, there several players who fell from grace this week, as well.  For all affected this week I have some consolation words for you:

Hello darkness, my old friend
I’ve come to talk with you again……

Next week the NASCAR circus stays at home for a home game at Charlotte.

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UPM FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN”!

Could Bowyer Punch His Ticket At Dover?

Clint Bowyer & Matt Kenseth

This week NASCAR rolls into the Mid Atlantic states.  This week the race weekend is in the capital of Delaware, and just in the backyard of Dover AFB, the East Coast home of the largest cargo plane in the USAF, the C-5 Galaxy.

 

Our Dover Choices

 

Notwithstanding the fast that Clint Bowyer is in a must when situation to pass through to the the Round of 12, one quarter of the Redneck Fantasy League has chosen him as their favorite to drive his hot rod into Victory Lane Sunday afternoon.  Those five players that are backing Bowyer includes Jeremy The Coach, Cole The Redneck Understudy, ol Skid-Marc, Zee, aka Sissy, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff.

Not to be undone this week, there is a quartet of highly unlikely players who have gathered together to support the hottest driver in NASCAR this week, Martin Truex, Jr.  Those four players, who now doubt are BFTTCFF (Best Friends Til The Checkered Flag Falls) this week, consists of Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Carole, aka Rudy, Jerry The Buschwacker, as well as Dan The Numbers Cruncher.

There is a trio “of under the radar players”, Lonna The Quilt Angel, A&M Aggie Sue and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey that are riding shotgun with “Mr. Seven-Time”, Jimmie Johnson, this week at Dover.

Additionally, there are two drivers who have a pair of rooters, each supporting their efforts Sunday.

Snoopy Dawn and Doug The Gandy Candy Man are fervently putting all their marbles into the marble bag of young Chase Elliott, hoping that their man will move forward to the round of 12.

Meanwhile Jim, aka Chiefy and Bobby Blue Crush are banking “The Delivernator”, Denny Hamlin, can deliver them to Victory Lane Sunday.

When the checkered flag falls Sunday at Dover there will be four drivers and teams that will load up their car and equipment with their dreams dashed and their hearts crushed, damaged, or removed, kind of like “The Tin Man”.

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Your Most Humble Sheriff Stretches Out His Lead

Kyle Busch

Ol Kyile Busch can breathe easily now after locking himself into the Round of 12 of the Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series Playoffs with a dominating victory in Sunday’s ISM Connect 300 at New Hampshire Motor Speedway.

Starting from the pole, Busch collected a stage victory and led a race-high 187 laps en route to his third win of the 2017 season.

Kyle Larson finished second, while Matt Kenseth, Brad Keselowski and Martin Truex Jr. rounded out the top five.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

There was only one player who was riding shotgun with the race winner today.  David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey was the sole player that had selected ol “Rowdy”, aka Kyle Busch.  So to say that The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey had a great Sunday would be somewhat of an understatement!  Ol Kylie produced 58 points for “The Mudder”!  I might add that those 58 points was more that enough to get him evicted from “The Outhouse” this week!

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Well this mixed matched trio, Kathy The Church Forecloser, Jim, aka Chiefy, as well as Bernie The Bay Area Bandit came out smelling like a rose at Louden. All three of these players exhausted their “Young Money” pick early in this segment!  Fortunately for them picking Kyle Larson at New Hampshire was quite fortuitous!  All three of these players packed away a cool 50 points this week.

Next up is a gaggle of six players that were betting the farm on one of the drivers who, currently, does not have a job for 2018, Matt Kenseth.  These six players include Jeremy The Coach, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, ol Skid-Marc, Snoopy Dawn, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff, and all are doing their version of the happy dance with 48 points added to their 3rd segment totals.

Meanwhile, Lonna The Quilt Angel scored a very nice 47 points for Martin Truex, Jr’s late race rebound.

Rounding out the top five scorers this week is a trio consisting of Bobby Blue Crush, Carole, aka Rudy and Cole The Redneck Understudy.  All three of these players were riding shotgun with “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski.  “Bad Brad” delivered to this trio 45 points for the afternoon!

This is another week where there was widespread movement throughout the leaderboard.  In fact, only three players remained in their previous spots, the leader and Your Most Humble Sheriff, second place player Bobby Blue Crush, fifth place player, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, as well as Kathy The Church Forecloser.

The biggest movers of the week is our resident accountant, Dan The Numbers Cruncher and Linda The Cookie Mom!  For his microscopic 2 point Sunday The Numbers Dude dropped like a hot potato falling eight (8) spots from mid pack on the totem pole to landing on the front porch, 20th place, and nearly taking control of “The Outhouse”! The Cookie Mom grabbed 24 points Sunday, however, with the numbers that many of the other players slapped up on the board, she plummeted eight (8) spots to rest now in 13th place.

Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, likewise, did not fare all too great this week.  The Vegas Super Star slipped down five (5) places to sit now in 16th place.

Next up are five players, Carlton The Doorman, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit, A&M Aggie Sue, Cole The Redneck Understudy, as well as Lonna The Quilt Angel, all moved four (4) places this week.  The Doorman, The Bay Area Bandit, The Redneck Understudy and The Quilt Angel all stepped up four spots to sit in 9th, 10th, 12th and 13th, respectively.  Aggie  Sue, however, slid down to sit in 11th place.

Both Skid-Marc and David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey moved up three (3) place to reside in 15th and 18, respectively.

Rounding out the top five movers is a quartet of players that includes Jim, aka Chiefy, Jeremy The Coach, Snoopy Dawn, as well as Zee, aka Sissy. Chiefy, The Coach and Snoopy all climbed up two (2) places to land in 6th, 7th and 8th, respectively.  Sissy, on the other hand, fell two spots and now sits in 17th place.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

Dan The Numbers Dude takes home “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award.  The Numbers Dude could only muster up a minuscule 2 points this week. Nevertheless, The Numbers Cruncher did not fall all the way to the bottom this week.  That dubious honor falls on the shoulders of Jerry The Buschwacker, who is our new Prince of The Poophouse!

Next week NASCAR travels northeast from Charlotte to Dover, DE.  Dover is the elimination race for this round and for the bottom four drivers in points it will be “the last dance”!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Could Matt Kenseth Be The Spoiler At Louden?

Matt Kenseth

This week NASCAR migrates to New England.  Both the CWTS and the MENCS will be racing at the New Hampshire Motor Speedway located near Louden, NH.  It is the second race in the playoffs and the urgency level begins to ratchet up past 5 on the volume level!

This is the last time that there will be a playoff race at the New Hampshire Motor Speedway.  Beginning next year Bruton Smith is moving this race at the New Hampshire Motor Speedway to one of his other race tracks, the Las Vegas Motor Speedway.  Your Most Humble Sheriff is looking forward to that because I have been getting media credentials at that race track for the last four years!

I have digressed!

 

Our Louden Choices

 

The overwhelming choice by the fantasy league players this week is the soon to be unemployed Joe Gibbs Racing driver, Matt Kenseth.  Six players, Jeremy The Coach, Doug The Gandy Candy Man, ol Skid-Marc, Snoopy Dawn, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, as well as Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff have banded together this week hoping that Kenseth will rack up his first win for this season, punch his ticket to round 2, as well as possibly getting him an interview for a new job.

This week we have four players that have banded together in support of the second hottest driver in the Cup series, “Young Money”, Kyle Larson.  That quartet consists of Kathy The Church Forecloser, Jim, aka Chiefy, Carlton The Doorman, as well as Bernie The Bay Area Bandit.

Additionally, there is a totally unmatched trio that includes Kilimanjaro Bobby, Carole, aka Rudy and Cole The Redneck Understudy.  This motley crew will be all in and hoping that “Blazingly Bad” Brad Keselowski can punch his ticket to the second round of the playoffs.

Oddly enough, this week there is a large contingent of players, eight in all, who are beating the drum for their own particular drivers.  This is highly unusual that that there would be eight players with individual picks in one week.  So for one third of the fantasy league, those players are totally and absolutely in bidnez for themselves! Furthermore, with that many players having solo picks, there is ample opportunity for some players to make great gains on the leaderboard this week.

Good luck to all!

With Louden being the middle race of this three race elimination segment, the bottom four drivers in points of the sixteen drivers are in a position whereby they need a great finish and are just barely “staying alive”!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’ GO RACIN’!

Your Most Humble Sheriff Stretches His Lead After Chicagoland

Martin Truex, Jr.

Martin Truex Jr. opened the Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series Playoffs on the right foot, rallying from early adversity to land a victory in Sunday’s NASCAR Playoffs opener at Chicagoland Speedway.

Truex survived a tumultuous day for postseason contenders to score his fifth win of the season, his second straight at the 1.5-mile Illinois venue and the 12th of his career in NASCAR’s premier series. His Furniture Row Racing No. 78 Toyota was 7.179 seconds ahead at the finish, sealing a victory that clinched automatic advancement into the Round of 12, the next phase of the Playoffs.

Chase Elliott led 42 laps and finished second in the Hendrick Motorsports No. 24 Chevrolet as Playoff-eligible drivers swept the top six spots. Kevin Harvick, Denny Hamlin and Kyle Larson completed the top five in the first of 10 races that will decide the series champion.

 

The Fraternal Order of The Go Fast

 

With NASCAR’s new point system, awarding segment points plus race points, the winner of the race may not be the highest scorer.  That was the case this week at Chicagoland Speedway.  Even though Jim, aka Chiefy and Carlton The Doorman selected Martin Truex, Jr. as their man to win they were not the highest scoring players this week!  Chiefy and The Doorman, however, made “The Fraternity” this week, Martin Truex, Jr. with 49 points.

 

The Movers and Shakers

 

Looking at the scores this week, most everyone walked away from the race with some very good numbers!

The highest scorers this week are Bobby Blue Crush and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff, who were riding shotgun with William Clyde Elliott, Jr., aka Chase. Elliott was consistent all race, leading 42 laps and winning the 2nd stage.  That good day at the track for Chase gave Blue Crush and Your Most Humble Sheriff a nifty 53 points!

Carole, aka Rudy, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit, as well as Jeremy The Coach racked up 52 points.  This trio of characters were fully supporting “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick at Chicagoland and walked away from this race very comfortable.

The third highest scorers this week were the two who made it into the Fraternal Order of The Go Fast, Chiefy and The Doorman!

Meanwhile, there is a quartet that should be subject to some scrutiny!  That group of of players consists of Kathy The Church Forecloser, Skid-Marc, Linda The Cookie Mom and Doug The Gandy Candy Man, who had put all their marbles in the bag of “The Delivernator”, Denny Hamlin.  Hamlin, in return, delivered a cool 45 points to each of these players.

Rounding out the top five scorers this week are Dan The Numbers Cruncher and A&M Aggie Sue, who were hanging out with “Young Money”, Kyle Larson. This duo added, oddly enough, received 42 points from the driver who drives the No.42 car!

Since we are still early in the segment, this week there were 18 players out of 21 who moved around on the leaderboard.

The single biggest mover this week is Lonna The Quilt Angel, who dropped like a hot potato, falling seven (7) places after the checkered flag waved, landing in 17th spot!

Conversely, Jeremy The Coach had a marvelous afternoon rocketing up the totem pole five (5) positions to sit in 9th place.

Likewise, Jim, aka Chiefy moved upwards on the leaderboard four (4) places to sit in 8th place at the end of the day.

A&M Aggie Sue didn’t fare so well this week.  Even though A&M Aggie Sue had Kyle Larson and scored 42 points, she still fell three (3) places, knocking her out of the top five and now resting in 7th place.

Lastly, there are eight players who moved around the totem pole two (2) places this week.  Carlton The Doorman, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit and Kathy The Church Forecloser each moved up two places to reside now in 13th, 14th, and 16th, respectively.

Unfortunately, Karen The Highly Opinionated Southern Belle, Snoopy Dawn, Edie the Las Vegas Super Star, as well as Zee, aka Sissy all fell two positions the finish out the week in 4th, 10th, 11th and 15th, respectively.

 

Straight From The Crapper

 

By the coincidental fact that David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey scored only 20 points, which on any other weekend would be a reasonable score. However, it was not the case this week.  This week we have a player who racks up a two-fer!  The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey not only receives “The Crappiest Pick of The Week” award for those 20 points scored, but that also propelled him firmly into “The Outhouse”!

Next week NASCAR moves up into the Northeast at Louden New Hampshire for the second race in the playoffs.  With the competition ratcheted up in the playoffs, everyone is required to pay attention to detail, ie, to look at “every little thing”!  At the end of these 10 races there will be heartbreak for those that come up short!

Good luck to all!

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

Denny Hamlin Has The Nod At Chicagoland

Denny Hamlin

The “regular season” has ended and now the beginning of “the playoffs’ are scheduled to crank up this weekend at Chicagoland Speedway in Joliet, IL.  This is the time where the contenders will separate themselves for the pretenders!

 

Our Chicagoland Choices

 

As the headline states both Denny Hamlin is the favorite for the race at Chicagoland Speedway.

This week an unlikely quartet has unknowingly banded together to support “The Delivernator”Denny Hamlin.  That motley crew consists of Kathy The Church Forecloser, ol Skid-Marc, Linda The Cookie Mom, as well as Doug The Gandy Candy Man.  These four are hoping that Hamlin will start off the playoffs by punching his ticket to round two of the playoffs.

There are three drivers with a rooting section of three players.

Carole, aka Rudy, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit, as well as Jeremy The Coach are banking heavily that “Freaky Fast” Kevin Harvick will be the first driver to earn a trip to round two of the playoffs.

Cole The Redneck Understudy, Bobby Blue Crush and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff are all joining forces in order to get their man, Chase Elliott, into Victory Lane Sunday and on to round two.

While A&M Aggie Sue, Zee, aka Sissy and Dan The Numbers Cruncher are banking that one of the hottest drivers of the 2017, “Young Money” aka Kyle Larson, will continue where he left off last week and wheel his hot rod into Victory Lane at Chicagoland.

Both Jim, aka Chiefy and Carlton The Doorman are backing the other hot driver for 2017, Martin Truex, Jr.  Truex has, week in and week out, been a dominate figure and in a position to win the race.

Rounding out the picks, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star and Snoopy Dawn are betting the farm that Joey Logano can play spoiler this week and steal a victory.

For all the math majors in the fantasy league, adding up the numbers makes it 18 players that have teamed up with others to support a driver.  That means that we have three( 3) players who are in bidnez for themselves this week!

Good luck to all!

For all sixteen drivers who have made the playoffs, they definitely have “something to be proud of”!

As a tribute to Troy Gentry, one half of the duo of Montgomery Gentry, who we tragically lost Friday I will leave you with this video.

RIP Troy.

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR GLOVES UP,FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’ GO RACIN’!

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