(WOMR file photo)
Well, Roush-Fenway Racing came out of hibernation after just one trip to victory lane this year at Phoenix. Once again it was Carl Edwards who grabbed the win for RFR! One does not think of Carl Edwards when we discuss the really good road racers that exist in the Sprint Cup Series. Usually the names of Gordon, Ambrose, Johnson, and Stewart, would first come to mind. In the last two years this race was won by Michael Waltrip Racing drivers, Clint Bowyer, and the former MWR employee, Martin Truex, Jr.
The Movers and Shakers
Even though “Jeremy The Coach” did not score the most points at Sonoma, he scored just enough to still maintain a microscopic two (2) point lead over the new second place holder, “Bernie the Bay Area Bandit”!
“Bernie The Bay Area Bandit” and “Dan The Numbers Cruncher” smoked all of us this week! They had faith that the aging “Mr. Four-Time”, aka Jeff Gordon, would pull a rabbit out of his hat, and show the world that he is not ready for that old rocking chair. Even though Gordon did not win the race, nevertheless, he did put on a driving clinic with his charge to the front in the last twenty laps. That charge was enough to close up on the bumper of one “Cousin Carl”, giving Gordon a second place finish. With their pick of Gordon, “The Bay Area Bandit” and “The Numbers Dude” scored a cool 43 points, and thus, was the top scorer of the race!
Brandon, the younger of the Gandy invasion, put all his marbles on my man Dale Earnhardt, Jr., to show them how to do it in wine country. That gave Brandon 41 points at Sonoma. (Editor’s note here: Dale Jr. typically runs horribly in road courses, so to pick the leader of JUNIOR NATION at a road course showed Brandon was willing to step waaaaaay out on the limb, and leverage the whole the farm!) Big Kahonees, Brandon!
In spite of Kasey Kahne’s early race problems, he rallied up, charged up through the field, and gathered up a sixth place finish, giving Carole a nice payout of 38 points.
One of the favorites at either of the two road race venues, Marcos Ambrose, did not win the race, however, the four players who were riding shotgun with him faired well. “Jerry The Buschwacker”, “A&M Aggie Sue”, “Jim,aka Chiefy”, and “Jeremy the Coach” all were taking the odds on favorite at Sonoma, Ambrose. For their efforts they were rewarded nicely with 37 points Sunday.
Rounding out the top five scorers from the heart of the win country was both “Carlton The Doorman” and Doug Jr., each finished out the afternoon with good results. Each player grabbed 35 points, however, the scores came from different drivers Sunday. “Carlton the Doorman” was “sticking with The Biff” and Doug Jr. was sipping that 5Hour Energy Drink, and watching Bowyer turn right and left
Talk about shaking up the standings this week, only four players were able to maintain their position week over week! That means that sixteen (16) of us moved to another place in the standings!
The single biggest mover of the week was my man, “David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey”. “The Mudslinger” drove it in way too deep this week, and was unable to get back to the gas in time for the race finish. David’s pick, Kyle Busch, aka, The Las Vegas Weasel (TLVW), did not have a good outing, resulting in David scoring just 19 points. Those 19 points allowed David to plummet six (6) places in the standings this week!
Likewise, Marc fell from grace as well, sliding five (5) spots after the checkers was displayed at Sonoma! The ol FedEx deliveryman, Denny Hamlin “The Delivernator” failed his drivng test at Sonoma!
Edie, in a rare strategy move, really increased her efforts towards ousting Jason from “The Outhouse” this week! Edie went with “Smoke” for the win, and came up very short, falling another four (4) places on the totem pole this week!
Lonna, too, lost ground to the leaders this week, sliding three (3) positions.
Conversely, there were a number of players who bettered their positions after consuming a little California wine. “Jim, aka Chiefy”, Carole, Doug, Jr., and Brandon all rocketed up the chart, gaining four (4) place each!
Moving up in the standings modestly by two (2) places were, both “Bernie The Bay Area Bandit” and yours truly, “Leon The Former Airline Captain, Part-Time Cardiologist, Cotton Picker, and Your Most Humble Redneck Sheriff”.
Straight From The Crapper
This was not a too terrible of a week for scores for the players. However, Marc showed us that , once again, he has that uncanny ability to garner the least amount of points on any given week. This week he really did not do too terribly, however, his 18 points earned him “the crappiest pick of the week” award!
To say that “Jason The Latent Tie Dye Hippie” has been constipated would be an understatement! There has not been any “movement” in the in “The Outhouse” for last three weeks! “The Tie Dye Dude” has had a firm grip on “the throne” for most of this segment, however, his aunt, Zee, is been making “a run” for “The Outhouse”. She has now closed the gap to just four points!
Next week the traveling circus known as NASCAR moves to Kentucky for a Thursday, Friday, Saturday night full house weekend (Trucks, Nationwide, and Sprint Cup).
So, “Let’s all go down to Dumas Walker’s”!
TIL NEXT TIME,PULL YOUR GLOVES UP, FLIP YOUR VISOR DOWN, AND LET’S GO RACIN’!