
It was a dominating victory for Kevin Harvick and a statement of superiority for his No. 4 Stewart-Haas Racing Ford team as the Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series heads toward its 10-race playoff.
It was an ignominious end to Jimmie Johnson’s unique and unprecedented streak of qualifying for every Cup Series postseason.
And it was heartbreak for Daniel Suarez, as he chased Ryan Newman over the final nine laps of the Big Machine Vodka 400 at Indianapolis Motor Speedway with the final playoff berth in the balance.
Newman came home eighth, as he and fifth-place finisher Clint Bowyer locked up the final two playoff spots. Suarez ran 11th after getting trapped in traffic on the final restart on Lap 152 of 160 and finished four points behind Newman in the final regular-season standings.
But the story of the race was Harvick, who was in a class by himself. The 2014 series champion won the second stage and during the final nine laps of the race sped to a 6.118-second advantage over runner-up Joey Logano.
Harvick started from the pole, led five times for 119 laps and controlled the event, except for one 19-lap stretch when eventual seventh-place finisher Ryan Blaney grabbed the top spot after a restart on Lap 112.
We have a new leader on our scoring pylon! Edie The Las Vegas Super Star shot to the top of the leaderboard after the checkered flag waved at Indy!
THE FRATERNAL ORDER OF THE GO FAST
Finally, we have a winner of this prestigious weekly award! This week Carlton The Doorman was neatly tucked away in Kevin Harvick’s copilot seat and was rewarded 58 much needed points early in the last segment!
THE MOVERS AND THE SHAKERS
Following The Doorman’s fantastic day at Indy is an unlikely duo of Edie The las Vegas Super Star and Bobby Blue Crush. Both players racked up a cool 38 points today and both were in the hip pocket of Clint Bowyer at Indy.
Meanwhile, Leon The Retired Airline Pilot, Part-Time Cardiologist and Strawberry Picker, as well as Your Most Humble Sheriff added a nice 35 points to his totals from Ryan “No Neck” Newman’s 8th place finish.
Following our Most Humble Sheriff’s good day at the races is Jim, aka Chiefy, who added 28 points to his bucket. Chiefy was supporting William Clyde Elliott, Jr. at Indy. Chiefy was really hoping that Chase could paste another winner sticker on the door jam of his hot rod at Indy.
Rounding out the top five shakers is Jeremy The Coach. The Coach racked up a much needed 24 points from Aric Almirola’s 14th place finish.
Because there were so many players tied with each other after the opening salvo of this segment, there will be several players who plummeted like a hot potato this week!
There was a threesome who moved nine (9) places when the checkered flag flew at Speedway, IN. That trio consists of Dan The Numbers Cruncher, Linda R. The Lemonade Lefty, as well as Carole, aka Rudy. All three players dropped like a prom dress this week, falling nine positions to sit now in tie for 13th, and tie for 15th place, respectively.
Equally devastating was the race that Snoopy Dawn had at Indy. Snoopy plummeted eight (8) spots to rest in 15th place as the Sun set on IMS.
There were also four players that moved six (6) positions this week. Those four players include Linda B. The Cookie Mom, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, Kathy The Church Forecloser, as well as Lonna The Quilt Angel. All four players stumbled and fell six places to now sit in 7th, 10th, 11th, and 12th, respectively.
Meanwhile, Jim, aka Chiefy slide five (5) spots to rest in 10th place.
Rounding out the top five movers this week is a duo consisting of Jeremy The Coach and Amber The Extremely Lucky Cheddar Head. Both players dropped four (4) places to now own 5th and 6th places, respectively.
STRAIGHT FROM THE CRAPPER
This week we have two players who excelled in their choosing a winner this week. Both Snoopy and Rudy could only muster up one (1) microscopic point from Blazingly Bad Brad Keselowski this week! For their incompetence this week they will share The Crappiest Pick of The Week award!
Additionally, these two ladies, Snoopy and Rudy, will be roommates this week as they also share a coveted recognition, The Outhouse Award!
Now that the sixteen drivers have been established for The Playoffs, some dreams and futures have been shattered for 2019! But the chosen Sweet Sixteen will continue to dream on about a championship bid in 2019!
Check out the results of the Big Machine Vodka 400 at Indianapolis.
TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR BELTS TIGHT AND LET’S GO RACIN”!