Chase Elliott


Moments after taking the checkered flag in Sunday’s Bank of America ROVAL 400 at the Charlotte Motor Speedway road course, race winner Chase Elliott revisited the site of his biggest mistake.

Elliott drove his No. 9 Hendrick Motorsports Chevrolet up to the tire barrier in Turn 1 of the 2.28-mile, 17-turn course and began a burnout that bordered on the sarcastic.

Early in the final stage of the 109-lap event and after a restart on Lap 65, Elliott locked up his brakes and plowed straight into the tire barrier, taking out the “Tums” logo in the corner known as Heartburn Turn. After pitting to address the damage, Elliott fell to 37th in the running and spent the rest of the race working his way forward.

After a spate of opportune cautions, Elliott took the lead for good on Lap 104, passing Martin Truex Jr. for second and Kevin Harvick for the top spot after the final restart.

Five laps later, Elliott crossed the finish line 3.016 seconds ahead of teammate Alex Bowman, who made a heroic run from the rear of the field to finish second and wrestle the final berth in the Round of 12 in the Monster Energy NASCAR Cup Series Playoffs from Aric Almirola and Ryan Newman.

THE FRATERNAL ORDER OF THE GO FAST

This week no player had the foresight to pick Chase Elliott as their man for the Bank America ROVAL 400, so that prestigious award will go back into the closet til the checkered flag falls at Dover next week.

THE MOVERS AND THE SHAKERS

The biggest scorer of the week is our new leader, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit. The Bandit was riding shotgun with Blazingly Bad Brad Keselowski at Charlotte and received 46 points that catapulted her into the top position on the totem pole.

Following The Bandit on the scoring pylon this week is Snoopy Dawn. This week Snoopy put all of her marbles into the marble sack of the lead Stewart-Haas Racing driver, Freaky Fast Kevin Harvick. For that she was rewarded a very much needed 43 points.

Next up for discussion is a the duo consisting of David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, who parked his midget, leading the A Main flag to flag Saturday night, and Leon Your Most Humble Sheriff. Both players added 35 points to their buckets at Charlotte.

There are six players, one third of the fantasy league, accumulated 34 points when the checkered flag fell. This group includes Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Jeremy The Coach, Lonna The Quilt Angel, Carole, aka Rudy, Kathy The Church Forecloser, and Dan The Numbers Cruncher. Even though these six players all scored 34 points for their effort at Charlotte, they did not all share the same driver. The Vegas Super Star and The Coach were in Easy Money’s corner, Kyle Larson. Rudy was steadfastly holding out for Sliced Bread, Joey Logano. However, The Quilt Angel, The Church Forecloser, and The Numbers Dude were rooting for Martin Truex, Jr.

Rounding out the top five scorers for the week is Linda R. The Lemonade Lefty. The Lemonade Lefty was supporting The Delivernator, Denny Hamlin this week, adding just 18 points to her totals.

This was another week of massive movement. Only three players, Edie The Las Vegas Super Star, Linda R. The Lemonade Lefty, and Kathy The Church Forecloser remained in their previous positions.

The single biggest mover this week is Kilimanjaro Bobby who dropped like a hot potato six (6) positions to now reside in 12th position.

Following Bobby Blue Crush this week is Carlton The Doorman. The Doorman plummeted five (5) places to land in 10th place.

Next up is a duo consisting of Amber The Extremely Lucky Cheddar Head and Linda B. The Lemonade Lefty. Both ladies tripped up and fell down four (4) spots to occupy 5th and 15th place, respectively.

A quartet of players, Snoopy Dawn, David The Mudslinging Throttle Jockey, Jeremy The Coach, and Lonna The Quilt Angel, moved four (4) places this week. All four players bettered their previous positions to sit now in 4th, 6th, 7th, and 9th places, respectively.

Rounding out the top five movers this week is our new leader, Bernie The Bay Area Bandit and Dan The Numbers Cruncher. Each player moved up in the standings to camp out in positions 1 and 11, respectively.

STRAIGHT FROM THE CRAPPER

This week one quarter of the fantasy league, four players in total, are sharing The Crappiest Pick of The Week award, Those four players are Amber The Extremely Unlucky Cheddar Head, Carlton The Doorman, Linda B. The Cookie Mom, and Bobby Blue Crush. All four players could only muster up one (1) microscopic point this week!

For the second week in a row Kathy The Church Forecloser is in firm control of The Outhouse.

Check out the results from the Bank America ROVAL 400.

Next week NASCAR rolls into Dover Internationals Speedway for its final visit to that facility for 2019.

Twelve drivers, seven races, one championship, who will be the last man standing?

TIL NEXT TIME, PULL YOUR BELTS TIGHT AND LET’S GO RACIN’!

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